The Trick Is To Keep Breathing
by kat2110
Summary: Charlize Dawson is a 21 year-old nursing student in L.A. When the world ends, she finds herself stranded with her ex-boyfriend's family. Will they find their way back together, or was their bond forever destroyed by his drug addiction?
1. Charlize

Charlize Emma Dawson was many things. She was a horrible poker player, because she could not keep a straight face; she was smart and compassionate, she was an only-child, but most of all, she was late.

"Oh my God, why don't you push your car? You'd be faster," the brunette uttered exasperatedly under her breath.

Los Angeles traffic was a nightmare, especially when you're late for your pharmacology exam. If Charlize ever dreamed of being a nurse, she needed to be in time.

Aimlessly drumming her fingers on the steering wheel of her Renault Clio, Charlize tried to focus on going through her study material in her head instead of letting herself get frustrated by the traffic she should have anticipated. Tylenol, Phenytoin, Heparin; this final was going to be a big one. Even though she had studied for weeks, she was still worried she would mix up medication or effects.

With exactly three minutes to spare, Charlize pulled into the UCLA parking lot and bolted out of her car, heading toward the lecture hall in which the final took place. She reached the room just as the doors were about to be closed and quickly took a free seat in the back. _I need to do more cardio,_ she cursed herself - pantingly - as she took out her pen and put her car keys away.

From across the room, Haley Reynolds, her friend and roommate, shot her a questioning look. _Where were you?_ Charlize waved her hand at her and rolled her eyes. _I'll tell you later._

* * *

"You sure cut it close there, huh?" Haley grinned as she came up to her friend after the exam. Haley Reynolds was a tall, black-haired goddess, as Charlize liked to refer to her. She was also one of the most laid-back people to be around. Charlize often thanked whatever God there may be for having her as a roommate.

"Tell me about it. Was stuck in traffic. I didn't think I'd make it, but the thought of retaking this may or may not have made me skip a few stop signs," Charlize grinned, thinking back to all the hours the two of them spent on pharmacology; not just in class, but also at home.

"Me and a few of the others are gonna celebrate being done with finals tonight. You in?" Haley asked.

"I might join you for a couple of beers, but I gotta get up for work tomorrow morning, so no partying for me."

"I thought you didn't start until next week?"

"I asked if I could start early."

"Ambitious," smiled Haley.

"Student loans," laughed Charlize.

The two of them started heading out toward the parking lot, trying to talk about everything but the exam.

"You want to go grab dinner?" Haley asked.

"I'm having dinner at the Clark's, remember?"

"Oh, right," Haley laughed in response. "Having dinner with your ex-boyfriend's family. Without your ex-boyfriend being there," she smirked. "Come on, Charlie. You gotta admit that's somewhat weird."

Charlize rolled her eyes but smiled at her friends remark. Haley managed to question her relationship with Nick's family every time she mentioned the Clark's.

"Dude, I'm telling you - it's not," Charlize responded as they reached her car. She gave Haley a quick hug and made to get into the driver's seat.

"Have fun with the in-laws!" Haley shouted as she walked away.

Charlize rolled her eyes yet again, turned on the car and started heading toward the Clark's house.

* * *

This time, Charlize was perfectly punctual. She smiled as she pulled into the driveway of the suburban house. She had always liked it here, even now that she and Nick were no longer dating. They met in high school, were the epitome of high school sweethearts. She had immediately been drawn to the scrawny, witty teenage boy and they soon became friends. At first she was opposed to dating him, because of her being two years his senior, but as they got older neither of them could deny their attraction. Not that Nick ever tried to in the first place.

They were happy for a while. They were inseparable. Where there was Nick, there was Charlize, and vice versa. First love - they though they were invincible. They had a good run for almost two years, but after Charlize left high school and started college, an invisible gap seemed to form between them. Nick became more and more distracted and distant, started turning to drugs. That's what ended them.

Wallowing in memories, Charlize did not notice that the front door opened and a middle-aged blonde woman stepped out of the house. She smiled when she saw the brunette in the car.

"Charlie!"

Charlize snapped back to the present.

"Madison!", she exclaimed happily as she pulled up the window and exited her car.

The woman met her halfway up the driveway and pulled her in for a tight hug.

"It's so good to see you!"

Charlize followed her into the house and into the kitchen. She had always gotten along really well with Nick's family, even as a teenager, but her and Madison's bond grew once Nick's addiction began getting out of control.

In the kitchen, Nick's sister, Alicia, and step-dad, Travis, were already preparing dinner. Alicia was the first to embrace Charlize. The 17 year-old had gorgeous long, brown hair that fell on her shoulders in waves. She had always been the perfect child; never acted out, always had good grades. Quite the opposite of Nick. Not that he was dumb. He was quite intelligent actually, yet he never cared about school. Or now, college.

Travis was the last one to welcome Charlize. "Good to see you, kid," he said as he pulled her into a quick, one-armed hug.

Charlize smiled at him. She always felt at ease around them. Not that she did not have a good relationship with her own parents. She did. They were just traveling a lot ever since she turned 18 and she never saw them much. Which is why she loved being around the Clark's. They were far from perfect. A patchwork family, with Travis only recently entering the picture, Nick's real Dad having died only four years ago. But they felt like a family. They where chaotic and they fought a lot, but it was evident how much love they had for one another.

"So, what are we having?" Charlize asked as she walked toward the steaming pots on top of the stove.

"Carbonara."

"Aw, you know how to spoil me," Charlize smiled back at them as she looked into the pots and, quite naturally, started stirring the sauce.

"So, how did your finals go?" Madison asked as she came up next to Charlize and took over the other pots.

"Pretty good, I think. I'm actually just coming from my last one. If everything goes as I feel, I should be starting my senior year not lacking any credits," Charlize answered before taking a spoon and tasting the sauce.

"Well, we wouldn't have expected anything else," Madison stated, and turned to Travis and Alicia: "Can you guys set the table?"

"Sure," Travis said before he handed Alicia four plates, grabbed some silverware himself, and left the room.

"How are you guys doing?" Charlize asked.

"Oh, nothing new really. Alicia is excelling in all her classes, as usual. I just took over another class in school, and these kids are a nightmare. Don't get me wrong, I love teaching, but God, no wonder their old teacher retired early. And Travis is a bit stressed with Chris and Liza, but that's not really anything new," Madison told her. Liza was Travis' ex-wife, Chris was their 15-year old son, who, as many teenagers, was rebelling against his Dad because he was dating someone other than his Mum.

"How is Nick doing in college?"

For a moment, Madison did not answer Charlize's question and just stared at the pasta she was stirring. Then she cleared her throat. When she spoke, her voice was heavier and sadder than before.

"He dropped out a couple of months ago," she started. Charlize looked at her, not necessarily surprised, but taken aback still. "He disappeared again," Madison added.

"How long?" Charlize asked. Nick running away was nothing new, it was typically something that happened after he had relapsed yet again.

Madison swallowed and Charlize could tell that even after this having happened countless times, this conversation still was difficult for her.

"A month."

"Jeez, Madison. I'm sorry," Charlize replied and put a hand on Madison's back. A month was long, even for Nick.

"Has he contacted you at all?" Madison asked.

"No, I haven't seen or talked to him in like eight months. I'm sorry."

The conversation was interrupted by Travis and Alicia returning to the kitchen.

"How's the food?" Alicia asked.

Charlize could see Madison take a deep breath, and afterwards, her voice was back to a casual tone. "Almost done!" She smiled at her daughter.

"So, Charlie, where are your parents off to this time of year?" Travis asked.

"They're in Paris at the moment, I think," she told him.

"You think?" he raised an eyebrow.

"I talked to them two weeks ago when they were in Spain, and they said France was their next stop. But you know them," she smiled. "They like to change their minds last minute."

"What a life," Travis laughed.

"Wow, are you saying you'd rather travel Europe than being here with a son that rebels against you and a step son who's an addict and disappears every few months?" Alicia asked him teasingly and Travis lifted his eyebrows at her remark incredulously, but smiled nonetheless.

"Alright, let's stop the sarcasm and have some dinner," Madison announced.

The group relocated into the dining room and everyone dug into the food hungrily. They talked about everything. About Charlize and how she was doing at Uni, about Alicia's excelling high-school career and plans for the future, about Travis' and Madison's jobs at the local high school. About how the neighbors were doing, about Madison's weird colleague who constantly asked where she bought her shoes, about everything but Nick. Charlize looked from her plate to her company and thought to herself that she chose a pretty good alternative to celebrating being done with finals. She cherished the Clark's company and all the banter, even if Nick was missing, and even if instead of Nick's Dad, Travis had now been at the table with them for the past two years.

* * *

When Charlize left, she promised Madison to come by again soon, and Madison and Alicia promised her they would come by the coffee shop Charlie was working at for the summer break.

On her way home, Charlize looked forward to having a beer with Haley and calling it an early night afterwards. Life had definitely been easier since she turned 21 last winter. Sure, she had basically been on her own since she was 18, but it was only since she had been able to buy herself beer that she had started to feel truly independent. She knew she should work on her priorities, but she simply could not be bothered.

When she entered the small apartment she shared with Haley, her roommate was already almost done getting ready for her night out.

"So, how's your lover?" Haley teased, not even bothering to greet her friend.

"I wouldn't know. He's disappeared again," Charlize said dryly. Haley's tone changed immediately.

"Shit. I'm sorry, Charlie. You okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine. I mean it sucks, but it doesn't concern me anymore, does it?" Charlize replied. "Beer?"

"Sure."

Charlize kicked off her shoes and walked over to the fridge, getting two beers. She stopped in her tracks when she saw the leftover food in the fridge that had not been there this morning. The platter for two from Mario's, their favorite Italian restaurant, which they usually only ordered when they were with the two of them.

Charlize looked up and shot her roommate a questioning look. "Who'd you have dinner with?" she inquired, curiously.

"You're quite a detective, aren't you?" Haley smirked at her.

"Yeah, I went to detective school," Charlize answered matter-of-factly. "Who'd you have dinner with?"

"Courtney."

A huge smile formed on Charlize's face. "Haley Reynolds," she started, "I thought you don't do third dates."

"Well," Haley started, but didn't finish her sentence.

"Say it," Charlize teased.

"I like her, okay?" Haley answered, faking being exasperated.

"I knew it!" Charlize exclaimed while Haley rolled her eyes at her.

"Stop getting so excited about this," Haley laughed.

"Why? I like her. More importantly, _you_ like her. I'm just excited for my friend."

"You're exhausting."

"I'm adorable."

"I'm gonna move out."

Charlize sat down on the couch, taking a sip of her beer, smiling. She always liked to tease Haley about how casual she was about dating, and took advantage of every opportunity that offered itself once she noticed that Haley actually liked a woman she had met. Call it payback for all the shit she had gotten from her about Nick.

"Hey, I'm not gonna join tonight. I'm exhausted. Think I'm just gonna head straight to bed after this," Charlize said, gesturing toward her beer. Haley was already putting on her shoes.

"Yeah, I figured, with the beer and the couch and all," Haley smiled and took a big sip from her beer, successfully finishing the bottle. Charlize stared from Haley's empty beer to her own, which was still 3/4 full, and raised an eyebrow to no one in particular.

"I'll see you later," Haley said while walking out of the door.

"Be careful out there!" Charlize said, mimicking a motherly tone. "I love you!"

"You're annoying," she heard Haley shout from outside, but Charlize knew she was smiling.

She smiled to herself as well. She put on an episode of Friends, drank her beer, and once she was finished with both, she went to bed, thinking that it had been a good day.

* * *

The next morning, Charlize headed out early to the small cafe and bistro she usually spent her summers working at. She got along with the colleagues, the place was small, yet not too small, and the pay was fair. It wasn't the best, but she could not complain. She was almost done with her shift, thinking about what to do in the afternoon now that she had all the free time in the world, when her phone rang. It was Madison.

"Madison, haven't heard from you in a while," she laughed as she picked up.

"Charlie, I knew you are not involved in this anymore, but I thought you would want to know," Madison said, and Charlize was immediately sobered up by her tone. Something was wrong.

"Nick was in an accident," Madison said, sounding upset. "He's in the hospital."


	2. Hospitals and Churches

Charlize got out of her car and anxiously walked toward the main entrance of the hospital. Madison could not tell her much on the phone, they had just gotten the call and were on the way to the hospital themselves. Charlize had finished her shift, and headed straight to the hospital afterward.

"Excuse me, where do I find Nick Clark?" she asked the woman at the reception, and then followed the direction she was pointed in. She absentmindedly thought about why exactly she was there. Why would she go see her ex-boyfriend at the hospital even though they had not talked in eight months? Back then he had disappeared too, and never gotten back in touch. Eventually, Charlize stopped trying to reach him.

She took the stairs up the the first floor, took a right, and entered the ward she was told Nick was in. She quickly walked down the corridor, passing other patients' rooms, until she reached his. Next to the door was a big window, and she immediately recognized her ex-boyfriend. He was sleeping. He looked a little banged up, but it was not nearly as bad as she had pictured in her head. His light brown hair was tangled and greasy, he looked like he had not taken a shower in a while. Then again, even when it was clean, Nick's hair had always looked messy and tangled.

Charlize's eyes wandered from his hair and his dirty face down to his hospital gown, the blanket that was covering the lower half of his body, and eventually, his arms. She had not noticed that his wrists were restrained before. She sighed, and could feel her heart sinking. This had to mean he had been involved in something illegal.

Once she had seen him, and realized he was, at least physically, going to be okay, Charlize became more aware of the voices around her. She hadn't realized how worried she was. She could hear Travis and Madison now, their voices were coming from around the corner.

"I can't leave him like this," she heard Madison say as she started walking into their direction.

"Leave him with me. I'll stay," Travis answered, and Charlize realized they were discussing who'd stay here and skip work.

"You didn't sign up for this. You didn't sign up for any of this."

"Yes, I did. I signed up for exactly this.." - "Don't go sentimental!" - "..when I fell in love with you", Travis finished, despite Madison's appeal.

Charlize stopped right as she was about to turn the corner. She did not want to get in the middle of this argument, especially now that there was an uncomfortable silence.

"You just threw up in your mouth a little?" she hear Travis ask.

"Yeah, a little," Madison answered and the tension was broken. "You sure you're okay to stay here with him? Who is going to take over your lessons?"

"I'll watch him," Charlize heard herself say, surprising herself, and turned the corner.

Both Madison and Travis turned toward her, surprised not only by her offer, but also by her presence. Madison was wearing a dark sweater and she looked worn out. The perks of having a drug addicted son who gives you sleepless nights. Travis looked tired as well. Even though Nick was not his son, and Nick had always had problems accepting him, Travis cared unconditionally and was willing to go all out for him.

"Charlie, you don't have to.." Madison started, but Charlize stopped her. "I know I don't," she smiled at Nick's mother, "but I don't mind. I don't have anything to do anyway. I worked the early shift and am done for the day. Just come back after work. You have enough to worry about."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, of course," Charlize said. "I just saw him. He looks okay. What happened?"

"He was hit by a car."

"A car? How did that happen?"

And Madison told her about how Nick apparently ran into traffic without looking, frantic. He had been high, but the doctor refused to tell them what he had been on, since he was over 18. The police had been there too, but Nick did not talk, just avoided their questions. While Madison was talking, Zoey could see that her appearance had changed since she had seen her yesterday evening at dinner.

Yesterday she had been a worried mother, trying not to show it. Today, with her son lying in the hospital, she just seemed exhausted. She had been in this situation a dozen times. She was calm, in a sense that this was not even close to being a new situation, but at the same time, slightly angry. Not as much directly at Nick, even though she most definitely was, but at the situation itself. The disappointment of seeing that he had not changed, had not gotten better, had gotten worse even, was weighing heavily on her, even though she did her best not to show it. Charlize wondered how much longer she could do it before she gave up. Then again, Madison was much tougher and resilient than most mothers.

* * *

After Madison and Travis left, Charlize went into Nicks room and made herself comfortable in a chair next to his bed. From close up, she could see that he looked even dirtier than from the window. One foot was sticking out of the blanket and the sole was completely black, like he had not worn shoes in a while. The skin on his arms and part of his face was grazed, Charlize assumed that came from the asphalt when the car hit him. There were needle marks on the inside of his elbow.

She had to force herself to take her eyes off of him. The sight of him, and the knowledge that he still did this to himself that came along with it, weighed on her chest and made it harder to breathe. This felt all too familiar, and she did not want to get back to the place where this, and he, would affect her this much.

Instead, she took a magazine from the table next to the nurses' station, wishing she had brought a book, and spent the next couple of hours reading about celebrity scandals and how to wear maxi-skirts this summer. It was a horrendous read, but it was better than nothing.

Eventually, Nick stirred and Charlize looked up at him. He was moving his head from left to right, his eyes moving hectically under his eyelids. He was grunting quietly once in a while, and it was evident he was having a nightmare.

Charlize reached out her hand and carefully put it on his forearm, her thumb gently stroking his skin. The touch seemed to have pulled him back into consciousness, and Charlize watched as Nicks eyes fluttered open and close a few times, adjusting to the light. For a split second, the expression in his eyes was one of confusion; he was still stuck in the brief moment between dream and reality. Then, as memory settled in, his expression relaxed, and fear was replaced by the infamous Nick-Clark-Pokerface. Nick had always been able to put on a great face which replaced every emotion he might feel at the moment if he wasn't ready for people to see it.

His eyes then followed the source of the touch, and Charlize gave him a small smile as he looked at her.

There was a moment of silence, of him processing this information.

"You are the last person I would have expected here," he eventually said in a casual tone.

"Both Travis and your Mum had to go to work, so I volunteered to wait here until they come back."

"Mum told you I was here?"

Charlize nodded.

"Why?"

"I had dinner with them last night. She thought I'd wanna know."

If Nick was surprised, he didn't show it. He simply turned his head straight again and stared against the wall, seemingly lost in thought.

"What happened?" Charlize asked eventually. Nick looked back at her and questioningly raised his eyebrows.

"The accident. Why did you run into traffic?" Charlize paused for a second, but decided to add: "They said you were frantic."

He turned his head away from her again. "It's because of what I saw," he said.

"What did you see?"

"You wouldn't believe me."

"Nick."

He did not answer.

"Nick, look at me," Charlize said, and Nick slowly turned his head, his eyes finding hers.

"We've been over this. I am not Travis. I am not your Mum. Just talk to me," she said gently.

"I'm not crazy."

"I know that."

Nick took a deep breath, and Charlize knew whatever he was about to tell her, it was difficult for him.

"I saw Gloria," he started. "She's a girl I know. She's a friend...Urgh, Jesus," he groaned and put his hands on his face, rubbing up and down. "Okay so it's like this," he continued after he put his hands down, but he still didn't manage to look at her while talking. Instead, he looked at his hands. "You buy at the corner and then you shoot up at the church. It's junkie communion. Gloria, Glo-.., she was with me when I scored. She was with me when I - when I nodded -"

"It's okay," Charlize tried to say in a calming tone. Nick was working himself up.

"When I woke up, I - I went down..everybody was dead, and Gloria - Glo, she was.."

"Nick,"

"It was all over her, it was all over her face, and then she came at me and she - her eyes - they were open but she was just - she wasn't seeing me,"

"What did she do, Nick?"

He paused. "She was eating them."

Charlize swallowed. She didn't know what to say. She had seen Nick high many times. She had seen him in withdrawal many times. She had never seen him like this.

"Nick," she started carefully. "What you saw...the drugs made you see it."

"No, no, no," Nick exclaimed, hectic, raising his hands up into his hair, pulling, exasperated. "I don't know what I saw came from the drugs." He looked at her again. "But if it didn't, it came from me. And if it came from me, that means I'm going insane." He let out a breath. "And I don't wanna be insane, Charlie. And I don't want what I saw to be real. I also don't want it to not be," he trailed off.

Charlize looked at her ex-boyfriend. She had never seen him so fragile, so close to a breakdown. She asked where the church was, and Nick absentmindedly told her, his mind still replaying what he thought he had seen.

"I'll go check it out," Charlize said and made to get up.

"What?" Nicks head snapped around. "No!"

Charlize stopped in her movement and looked at him, surprised.

"You can't, it's dangerous! You need to promise me you won't go there!" he said urgently.

"Okay, okay. I won't. It's okay. I'll stay here," she said, trying to calm him down again, and sat back down in her chair.

Nick leaned back in his pillow, both of them lost in thought. They were silent.

* * *

Charlize was quietly humming along to the song playing on the radio while checking the street signs. After Travis was finished at work, he came to the hospital and relieved Charlize of watching-Nick duty, and after promising Nick she wouldn't go to the church, she went straight to her car and started heading to where he had described the church would be. Sometimes, she couldn't keep every promise she made.

She found the place rather quickly, Nicks description was accurate. After she parked her car, she eyed the church from afar. It had been out of use for a while and looked correspondingly deteriorated.

She entered the place through the window Nick described, and inside it was even worse. The furniture that was left was thrown over, broken. There were tents, mattresses, sleeping bags. Trash was everywhere. It reeked of feces, sweat, vomit, and other things she couldn't, and didn't want to, identify. The windows were covered with newspapers and ripped curtains, so there was barely any daylight.

Charlize shivered. This place gave her chills, she could not believe people lived here. Even if you were on drugs this place must be depressing and creepy. Her first instinct was to turn around and leave again, but she forced herself to go on, for Nick's sake. She carefully started walking through the room, using the flashlight on her phone to guide the way. The sound of every step she took was amplified by the massiveness of the empty room, and she felt strangely exposed. What if Nick was right and his friend (for a second she wondered if they were more than friends) really did murder the others? What if she was still here? Charlize had nothing on her to defend herself with.

She pushed the thoughts away and continued on to a corridor, making for the upper level. She walked very carefully, trying to make as little noise as possible. She reached the stairs and slowly went up.

There was another corridor. Charlize took a deep breath and kept on walking. There were doors on the left side of the wall, and she noticed one of them was standing slightly ajar.

"Gloria?" she asked quietly. She touched the door and gave it a little push, but when she did a man ran out, frantically. Charlize jumped back toward the wall and for a split second, her flashlight illuminated the man's face. His face was pale, as if he hadn't seen the sunlight in years, his eyes were wide, and everything about his expression showed panic.

"Don't - don't kill me - don't.." the man kept repeating, and bolted for the stairs. Before Charlize could react, he was gone. She leaned against the wall, her heart hammering in her chest as if it was about to burst through her rib cage. She closed her eyes for a second and tried to calm her breathing and steady her heart.

When she continued down the corridor, her hands were shaking, causing the light to flicker off the walls nervously, creating creepy shadows. She reached another big room.

"Gloria?" she tried again, hoping she wouldn't find her. She carefully walked through the room. It was hard to make out much, it was so dark. She turned her light towards the floor and realized there were footprints. Someone must've stepped in mud and walked through here. She followed the footsteps until they turned, carefully stepping over all the objects lying on the floor to not make any extra noise. She turned into the direction the footprints were, but just as she did there was a screeching noise behind her. She jumped and turned around, continuing into the direction she was walking in before, but this time backwards, as her foot got caught on something on the floor and she lost her balance.

Instinctively she used her left hand to catch her fall, so when she hit the ground she landed on her ass, elbow and hand. A quick shooting pain ran through her forearm, but she ignored it and quickly used the phone in her right hand to shine the light into the direction of the noise.

A rat. She just fell, because of a rat. She sighed, but as soon as she relaxed, she noticed she had fallen into a puddle. She shone the light onto where she landed and immediately jumped up. Her stomach turned. The tracks hadn't been from mud, they had been from blood. And she had just fallen into the source. A big puddle of drying blood, viscera, and tissue. She felt nauseous.

Was Nick right? Did someone die here? It sure looked like it.

She bolted out of the church. Once she got out of the window, she ran down the alley and understood why Nick ran into traffic. Just before she exited the alleyway onto the busy street, she forced herself to stop and take off her jacket. A bloody jacket would draw way too much attention.

She folded the jacket so the stain was on the inside, and clammed it under her arm. The image of the puddle and the panicked man were replaying in her head over and over again. She took a deep breath.

She had to go back to the hospital.

* * *

When Charlize reached the hospital, she could not manage to get out of the car. What would she tell Nick? What would she tell Travis? Madison? Every time she closed her eyes she could see the tissue and the viscera and the blood, and she would feel nauseous. No wonder Nick looked like he was close to a nervous breakdown. How was he going to deal with it? Would he turn back to drugs, run away? Was there any way she could prevent that?

She jumped in her seat when her phone started ringing.

After composing herself, she answered. It was Haley.

"Hey Charlie, are you already on your way home?"

"No, why are you asking?"

"I was wondering if you could swing by the pharmacy for me to get some medication?"

"You okay?"

"Yeah, it's not me. It's Courtney. She spent the night but was really sick when she woke up. She's burning up and all that comes with it, so I don't really wanna leave her."

"Yeah of course, I'm at the hospital at the moment anyway so I'll get some Advil on my way out."

"Hopital?" Haley asked, surprised.

Charlize took a deep breath. "It's Nick."

"Is he okay?"

"Yeah, he is. I mean - physically he is. Was hit by a car. He was high and rambled on about people being dead and his friend eating them and - Jesus, Haley, I have never seen him like this. He sounded crazy,.." Charlize felt herself starting to ramble. Everything she was feeling was pouring out without her being able to stop it.

"He was restrained to his bed by the police, and he said his friend had murdered everybody at the church they use as a drug den, and I didn't know what to do so I went to check..and..Haley,..oh God, I can't believe I'm saying this... I think he might be right. There was so much blood, and tissue, and I slipped and fell in it, and now I'm back at the hospital, and my bloody jacket is lying on the passenger seat, and I don't know what to tell him. What do I tell him?"

Haley made to answer, but Charlize just kept talking. Tears started forming in her eyes.  
"If I tell him he's right, he'll loose it. If I tell him he's wrong, he'll think he's insane. I - I can't do this...I can't do this," Charlize added quietly.

"Sweetie," Haley said, her voice gentle. "How about you don't tell him anything for now? Come home, we'll talk about it, we'll figure something out," she paused for a while, but Charlize could tell that she wanted to say more.

"I know you care deeply about Nick, but you need to stop putting him first when he comes back from a bender. Right now you need to figure this out for yourself before you can figure it out for him."

Charlize nodded, forgetting Haley could not see her. She was right. Nick and she hadn't been dating - really dating - for almost two years. They had still hooked up after, but it was different. He was already more committed to the drugs than he was to her. He would always come out of hiding, come to her for support, and she was always there to make sure he was okay. He'd swear he'd stop using this time, his Mum putting him into rehab, but eventually he'd disappear without a word, for weeks, until one day he was in front of her door again, swearing he's done.

Charlize knew it was time to cut the cord, to stop allowing Nick to always sneak his way back into her life when he needed help, just to leave her again without a word. "You're right," she told Haley, as she was wiping away her tears. "Thank you, I guess I needed to hear that."

"Are you gonna be okay?"

"Yeah, yeah. I will. Go back to Courtney, I'll get the meds on the way home."

* * *

When she got back to Nick's room, both Travis and Madison were there. She gave them a smile, and then looked at Travis.

"Travis, can I talk to you for a second?"

He followed her to the corridor outside and looked at her, curiously.

"I went to the church Nick talked about."

"Charlie..", Travis started but Charlize stopped him.

"No, Travis. You heard the story right? Nick told you?"

Travis nodded.

"I think he's right."

Travis raised his eyebrows in surprise. "What do you mean?"

"It was bad. There was an insane amount of blood and tissue and guts. There was definitely a fight. I think Nick might be right. No one could survive losing that much blood. One guy was still there, but he ran away from me repeating 'Don't kill me' - I don't know what else to make of it."

Travis contemplated this for a moment, his expression serious, his eyebrows furrowed in doubt for a second.

"You shouldn't have gone there alone."

"I know I shouldn't have. But I didn't believe him. Did you?"

Travis paused, then sighed. "No, not really."

Charlize nodded. "I'm gonna talk to Nick before I leave."

When she entered Nicks room, Madison got up and joined Travis outside, giving them some space to talk in private. Charlize sat down in the chair again. For a moment, she did not know how to begin. She took a deep breath and looked at Nick, who was leaning back in his pillow, looking at her, giving her the smile she loved. It was one of the few expressions he could make that made him seem completely innocent, and it was the one smile that usually made her forget everything he had put her through since they had fallen in love.

"I went to the church," Charlize began, and Nick's expression changed immediately. He lifted his head from the pillow, his smile vanished from his face and his eyes grew wide.

"I told you not to-"

"I know you did, but I didn't believe you. I do now."

"What did you see?"

"Blood, guts, - it was bad."

"The bodies?"

"No, there were no bodies."

"But they-"

"Nick,", Charlize interrupted him again. He faced her.

"What are we gonna do? What's happening?" Nick asked.

Her heart sunk when she heard him using 'we'.

"Nick, _we_ won't be doing anything," she started, trying to not make it sound harsh, trying to make it sound like she wasn't abandoning him. "I'm sorry, but I can't do this. I've been doing this again and again and again, every time you have come out of hiding, and I can't continue to be there for you when you're never there for me," she swallowed. "You always leave. I cannot handle you leaving me again."

Nick did not say anything. When she looked up at him, he looked upset, but he nodded. She hoped he understood.

Charlize got up, leaned over him, and kissed his forehead. "I'm so sorry."

She left without looking back.


	3. Nick

_Nick Clark was a junkie. Looking back at it now, the signs that he was susceptible to addiction had been there as long as he could remember. As a kid, he would always climb on the highest trees, oftentimes falling and hurting himself; he would get the swing close to looping and jump off at the highest point, spraining his ankles; everything to get a rush of adrenaline. Even back then, playing in a sandbox like the other kids was not enough for him._

 _As he got older, the rush of being on the swing or climbing trees wore off, and he had to find other ways to feel alive. When he started high school, it crushed the life out of him. Not because it was difficult, it wasn't. It was too easy, it was too boring. He was smart, he knew that, but he didn't care about school._

 _Then he met Charlize, and all of a sudden, the adrenaline was back. Whatever chemical reaction happens in your body when you fall in love, it gave Nick a natural high. The jolt of excitement that went through his body when he spotted her in school, the tingling in his stomach when he heard her laugh, the rush of warmth in his heart when she made the little noise of affection she always made as he pulled her closer while they were sleeping._

 _When he was with her, he felt alive. But as relationships go, you become accustomed to each other, you fall into habit, you get in a rut. He became restless again. He didn't see Charlie as much, and instead spent time with people from school. One night they were at a party, and a friend gave him his first joint. That's how it started, and it didn't take long for him to spiral, to fall deeper and deeper into the abyss of addiction. Soon, weed wasn't enough anymore, ecstasy wasn't enough anymore, he needed more, more, more. He was taking LSD, heroin, prescription drugs, everything he could get his hands on._

 _His parents tried to put him into rehab many times, but Nick couldn't, wouldn't want to get clean. He needed the drugs like he needed oxygen. They made him feel alive, and that was all he needed. After his Dad died, it became worse. He couldn't bear being around his family, started disappearing for days at a time. It hurt him to hurt his Mum like that, hurt his sister like that, but he couldn't help it. His relationship with his family suffered, his relationship with Charlie ended. He would still sometimes show up at her place after they had broken up, and she would always take him in when he needed help. He always felt guilty about that, about making her think the drugs were more important than she was, about making her think he only came to her when he needed a place to crash. He had wanted to tell her that many times, but he had never gotten the words out. He didn't know how to explain it, how to make her understand that he needed to feel alive more than anything else._

That was what Nick thought about as he waited for Calvin in front of the diner in which they were supposed to meet. He had run away from the hospital a couple of hours ago, using the diversion caused by another patient dying. He had stolen the man's clothes, taken the money left in the pockets to buy a burner phone and cigarettes, and had called Calvin. He needed to shoot up, but more than that, he needed to know what was in the powder Calvin had sold him last time.

"Nicky, what's going on?" Calvin said as he arrived and motioned Nick to follow him to a table inside. Calvin was a tall, dark boy, with strong facial features. He could have been a model, his face was that symmetric. He was wearing a silver-gray jacket over a white sweater, and a baseball cap, as though he tried not to be recognizable. They used to be friends, but now Calvin was mostly Nicks way of getting his hands on more stuff.

"Hey Cal, I'm really sorry," Nick started.

"What do you mean?" Cal asked as he sat down.

"I'm sorry to put you in this position-"

"Sit." Calvin interrupted him and Nick followed his instruction. Calvin seemed agitated.

"Your Mum is looking for you," Calvin continued.

"What do you mean?"

"Showed up at my folks'."

Nick swallowed. "Oh."

"Can't have that. Can't have people-" "No, Cal-" "coming to me looking for you."

Nick was beginning to feel agitated as well.

"She doesn't know what you do, Cal."

"You're not talking about me?"

"No, no. Cal - Cal, she's just really worried about me.."

Calvin eyed him, mistrusting, and Nick could feel himself starting to slightly panic. It was bad news if Calvin thought Nick had spilled on him.

"Cal, I swear..- I swear, man..I would...I would never hurt-...I would never tell anyone what you-.."

Nick trailed off and buried his face in his hands. This could not be happening, and his withdrawal intensified his anxiety even more.

"You hungry?" Calvin asked.

"No, no, no, no.."

"You need to get some food up in you."

"No, no, no. I just - I just need to know what you gave me," Nick said, still upset.

"I didn't give you anything."

"Was it laced, man? Was it PCP?"

"Laced?"

"Was it PCP?"

"Yeah, _I want my customers paranoid and pissed off and immune to pain_. You talking about my shit?"

"No,"

"Then where's your head at?"

Nick sighed. He had to tell him about the church, make sense of it.

"Cal, the church..it was a bloodbath. It was a horror show. Gloria killed two people, and I need to get it out of my head."

Calvin looked at him, disbelievingly. "Gloria is 90 pounds soaking wet,"

"Yeah."

"Barely strong enough to spike a vein."

"I know,"

"You're not making any sense, Nicky."

"I know. I know. I know. But I saw it, Cal," Nick said, the memory replaying in his head over and over again. "I saw her do it and I need to get it out of my head."

"You need to contain yourself," Calvin told him. He was trying to figure out what to do with his former friend, who looked like he was close to a nervous breakdown.

"Okay, yeah. I'm leaving."

"Come on, stay."

"No, man, I'm gonna go,"

"Nick. Stay. I get it, I get it. You think you saw some bad shit," Calvin started and he saw that Nick was on the verge of crying. He put his arm around Nick's shoulders, trying to comfort him. Nick leaned into the embrace.

"I can't wipe it out," Nick said with a strangled sob. "I can't..-I can't scrub it out."

"Yeah, you can," Calvin tried to calm him down. They were already drawing enough attention to them, especially with Nick looking like he stole his clothes from an 80 year-old man.

"How long has it been?"

"Um..a couple of days," Nick thought about it, and all of a sudden was in desperate need of a fix. "I'm managing," he added.

"Clearly," Cal said sarcastically.

"I'm really trying," Nick told him, thinking of what he told Alicia in the hospital. He told his sister he would quit. After what he saw, he was done. He had to be done. But right now he could not think straight. He couldn't go cold turkey like this, one day to the other. He wasn't strong enough.

"You got your works?"

"No,"

"I got you," Calvin told him.

"Oh man, thank you so much," Nick was relieved. "Thank you so much!"

* * *

Calvin gave Nick a ride. He asked him about the accident, about whether the police had been involved. Nick didn't make much of it, just sat in the passengers seat, thinking of how bad he needed to shoot up. He felt like his whole body was throbbing, asking for a fix. In his head there was just noise, party because of the withdrawal, partly because of what he had seen in the church. Gloria's hazy eyes, her behavior, it played on a loop. He was barely paying attention to where Calvin took him.

He snapped back into awareness when he heard Calvin getting out of the car. "Sit tight, brother. It's safe here," he said, and walked around the car to the trunk. Nick saw that Cal had taken him to the river. They were in a huge, abandoned lot, shielded from unwanted eyes.

When Calvin was done at the trunk, he walked around to the passenger side and opened Nick's door.

"Come on, Nicky," he began.

Nick was just about to get out of the car when he caught a glimpse of what Calvin had gotten out of the trunk. In his right hand, hidden behind his leg so Nick wouldn't see, was a gun. All of a sudden, Calvin's questions about Madison and the police fell into place. Calvin was not trying to help Nick. He was trying to get rid of him, so he wouldn't spill on Calvin's extra-curricular activities as a dealer.

Nick didn't know what to do. He tried to buy some time by stalling to get out of the car. Should he talk to Cal? Tell him he could trust him? No, it was too late for that, otherwise they wouldn't be where they were now. The only option left was to jump him, trying to get the gun out of his hand before Calvin could do anything.

"Come on," Calvin repeated.

Nick slowly made to get up. He needed the moment of surprise, otherwise there was no chance of overpowering Calvin. Calvin was tall, strong. Nick couldn't take him on a good day, and now he was in withdrawal. He was shaking as it was already.

Nick was fully out of the car by now. He stood in the door for a second, pretending to stretch, pondering his next move. He decided to just go for it. He made a quick movement toward the gun and managed to get his hands on it, but Calvin realized what Nick was doing just in time to keep a firm hold of it. They were struggling, Calvin trying to point the gun at Nick, Nick trying to point it away from him.

"No, Nicky," Calvin shouted. He shifted his weight and managed to pin Nick against the car. Nick's body was full of adrenaline. The fix was forgotten, instead he just tried to fight his way out of this. He didn't want to die. He used his left shoulder to give Calvin a little push, which gave him enough momentum in which he managed to turn the gun away from himself, but in the struggle, someone - Nick couldn't tell who - pulled the trigger. The shot was loud, and echoed off the ground. As soon as it had started, the struggle stopped. All power went out of Calvin, and his limp body sunk to the ground.

Nick took a few steps back but did not manage to run. He kept turning towards Calvin's body, which was lying with his back toward Nick. His heart was hammering in his chest. Eventually, he took a tentative step toward the figure on the floor.

"Hey, Cal?" Nick asked quietly. "Cal?"

Did he shoot his friend? His heart was hammering so loudly that it must be audible for miles. All of a sudden, Nick became hyper aware of all the sounds around him. A car horn. A train whistle.

"Cal?" Nick tried again and made another step toward the body. Would he go to prison? Could he cover this up?

He was standing over the body now, and slowly bent down. He touched Calvin's shoulder, but he did not react. Nick slowly pulled and turned the body. Calvin's previously white sweater now had a big, red stain in its center. A puddle of blood was on the asphalt next to him.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no.." Nick uttered. He turned around. He turned back to Calvin. He was panicking. What should he do? Make a run for it? His DNA was all over the car, and the gun. The gun! Nick turned around and spotted the gun lying next to the car. He bent down and reached for it, changed his mind in the last second - he shouldn't touch it again - turned around, and bolted away.

* * *

A car honked. Travis was here. Nick came out of his hiding spot under the bridge and started heading to the car, but stopped in his tracks a couple of steps later.

"No, no, no, I told you not to bring her!" he said, referring to his mother. He had not calmed down yet, and this upset him even more. He didn't want her to know what he did.

"Where have you been? We've been looking for you!"

"I told you not to bring her!"

"Why wouldn't I?"

Nick knew he needed to say something, that was why he had called Travis in the first place, but he couldn't bring himself to, not in front of his mother. So instead, he leaned toward Travis' ear and whispered.

"I did - I did a bad thing."

"It's okay," Travis said, his voice gentle.

"What are you talking about?" his mother said.

"Just get in the truck," Travis said again, shooting Madison a look.

Nick didn't move. "It's not okay."

"Nick, what happened?" Travis asked. Both of them could see how nervous he was. Nick didn't know how to explain what happened.

"Okay, so..he-he pulled a gun on me,.."

"Who?"

"..he pulled a gun on me and he tried to kill me, and I just-I just wanted to know what was in the shit he gave me,.." Nick was working himself up again.

"What are you talking about Nick?" Travis asked.

"Calvin. I shot Calvin."

Travis and Madison were silent for a moment, Nick's answer obviously taking them by surprise.

"I killed Calvin," Nick said again.

"Where is he?" Travis asked finally.

* * *

So Nick took them to the empty lot where Calvin had taken him not even an hour ago. In the car, Nick overheard Madison telling Travis that it was her fault, sending Calvin to Nick like that while she was looking for him, and he overheard Travis saying something about self-defense, but he couldn't concentrate on their voices. When they reached the lot, they parked in a small tunnel so Travis' truck would not be visible. They saw Calvin's car and started approaching it, carefully.

"Calvin?" Madison said as she walked around the car. She then looked at Nick. "Where was he?"

Nick saw what she meant when he walked around the car too. The body was gone. There was only the red stain of blood on the asphalt.

"Wait-wait a second,-"

"There's no one here, Nick," Madison continued.

"He was right here!" Nick was desperate now. This was too much. These last 48 hours had been too much. "He was right here," he continued without noticing. Gloria killing the others, the hospital, Calvin. Was it the drugs? Was he going insane? Was he actually just hallucinating?

"He was right here," he said again. All the energy left his body and he sank to the ground, his mother trying to catch him.

"There is no one here, baby." She tried to soothe him, putting her arms around him. He reciprocated the movement and held on to her for dear life. Nothing made sense anymore.

"Let's get you back to the truck," Travis said. Madison helped Nick up and they slowly walked back and made to leave. Nick felt numb.

"Let's call Calvin, see what's up,.." Madison started as they were back in the car, but Travis interrupted her.

"Holy shit!" he exclaimed as he looked into the rear-view mirror. He got out of the car and told the others to stay inside, but Madison got out with him. When Nick turned around, he saw what they had seen. A person was shuffling toward them in the tunnel.

Calvin.

Only it wasn't Calvin anymore. There was a huge, bloody stain on his sweater, bigger than when Nick had left him, and his eyes were hazy. It was the same look he had seen on Gloria in the church.

"No, no, no, Mum! He'll kill you! He'll kill you!" Nick hammered on the glass. He could see Travis getting dangerously close to him.

"Calvin, can you hear me?" Travis asked, but instead of answering, the shuffling figure grabbed him and with a grunt, tried to sink his mouth into Travis' neck.

Nick reacted on instinct. He had seen this before. His Mum and Travis would not get far with talking. Nick jumped into the driver's seat, put the car into reverse, and started speeding the car backward through the tunnel, toward the struggling figures.

In the last moment, Travis managed to push Calvin away from him and jumped to the wall. The truck made impact with Calvin's body and fully drove over him. When he could see Calvin's form on the ground in the headlights again, Nick stopped the truck. A moment passed and no one moved. Travis and Madison were paralyzed, too shocked by what had just happened. But Nick had a premonition that this wasn't over.

A moment later, he was proven right. Calvin's body was stirring, moving, getting up. When he was fully standing upright again, he turned toward the truck that had just hit him. When he was exposed in the headlights, Nick could see that one of his bones was sticking out of his arm. He was mangled. There was no way someone could come back from this.

Calvin started moving toward Nick again. Nick put the car into drive. He took a deep breath and hit the gas. He hit Calvin's body with full force, dragged him until they were out of the tunnel, and then hit the brake with full force, causing Calvin to fly about 20 feet away from the car.

Nick could not take his eyes off of the body. Would he come back from this? In the corners of his eyes he could see Travis and his mother running down the tunnel. They stopped when they were next to the truck, everybody fixed on the lifeless body. Nick's heart was racing.

"God," Travis said.

Not much after that, Calvin's body moved and he got up again. When he turned around this time, Madison gasped. His jaw was missing, yet he was still walking towards them, making snarling noises.

"What the hell is happening?" Madison asked Travis.

"I have no idea."


	4. The Beginning of the End

Charlize groaned as her alarm went off. She hazily opened one eye and saw that it was 5:30 already. She must've slept through the first one. There was no time for snoozing, breakfast shift started at 6:30 sharp. She mentally scolded herself for volunteering for the early shifts, but sat up in bed anyway. She yawned, rubbed the sleep out of her eyes, and slowly shuffled to the bathroom.

The warm water helped to wake her up. Now that she was more alert, she went back to thinking about the church, about Nick. She hadn't been able to think about anything else since she had left the hospital. After she had gotten back home yesterday night, she had sat down with Haley for an hour, talking about what had happened and what she had seen. To her surprise, Haley was not as doubtful about Nick's story as Charlize had thought she would be.

"You believe him? Without having seen him or the church?" she had asked, surprised.

"Well, I'm not necessarily believing him...I don't think his friend was eating the others, but honestly, with everything that is going on, I can believe that she killed them," Haley told her. "I probably wouldn't have believed it this morning, but after hearing your story, and after seeing those videos..."

"Videos?"

"Oh shit, you haven't seen them?"

And so Haley had showed her a video of a news helicopter, filming the scene of an accident on the highway. Medics were trying to help an unconscious man, but all of a sudden he attacked the medic. The cameras showed the police entering the scene, shooting the attacker, but he did not go down. He kept coming, and coming, until he was shot in the head. Then he hit the ground like a tree.

Charlize felt sick to her stomach. What the hell was going on?

* * *

When she left the bathroom she was surprised to find Haley already up, preparing coffee in the kitchen. She was still in her pajama, which consisted of an over-sized Lakers jersey and woolly socks. Her black hair was up in a bun.

"It's not even 6, why are you up?" Charlize asked.

"Courtney..she's getting worse. Couldn't sleep with all that movement. Don't even get me started on the heat that radiates off of her," Haley said tiredly.

"The meds didn't help?"

Haley shook her head.

"Maybe you should take her to the hospital if she doesn't get better by tonight. Not much a nursing student can do right now," Charlize said and grabbed one of the cups Haley had prepared.

"Yeah, I'll think about it," Haley said as she shuffled back toward her room. "Have fun at work."

* * *

Work was even slower than the day before. There were barely any customers, even though it was a week day, which was unusual. Usually, people heading to work stopped by to at least get a coffee to-go. Even though one colleague had called in sick, she and her boss managed the business easily.

"Why is it so empty?" Charlize asked as she walked behind the counter.

"It's that virus that's going around," Suzanne said. "Everybody is sick."

"Did you see the videos of the highway?" Charlize asked and Suzanne gave her a knowing look.

"What do you make of it?"

"I don't make anything of it," Suzanne said simply. "It's gotta be fake. People just like making this virus extra dramatic."

Charlize nodded but did not answer. She'd like to push the topic away as easily as that, but she couldn't.

The morning dragged itself out. There were barely any customers, and Charlize checked her watch every two minutes. When she spilled coffee on her white shirt, she was officially done for the day.

* * *

She finished at 3 p.m., having had to stay longer because of the sick colleague, and was heading to her car when her phone rang. She checked the display, but did not recognize the number.

"Hello?"

"Charlie, I know you didn't want me to get in touch, but this is important," she heard the all-too-familiar voice of her ex-boyfriend.

"Nick..-" she started, but was interrupted by him straight away.

"No, no, I know! I'm not trying to keep you attached - I promise! You have to listen to me, please.."

Charlize was struck by his tone. He spoke with an urgency that almost resembled fear.

"You need to leave town!"

"What?" she asked in disbelief.

"This virus, the people getting sick...it's bad-it's dangerous. I don't know what's happening and no one talks about it, but it's really bad," he rambled on.

"Nick, what are you talking about?"

"Please just trust me, it's dangerous out there. Me, Mum, Alicia, Travis and his family are leaving town tonight, going to the desert, riding it out. Come with us."

"Nick," Charlize started again.

"No, no, okay. You don't have to come with us, but just-just leave, okay? Please, just leave town."

Charlize was getting tired. Not just because she had just worked a nine hour shift, but because Nick was yet again putting his shit on her.

"Nick, I can't leave town. I have work. Remember? Some people have to finance college, not drugs," she said, maybe a little too viciously.

"No, no, no, Charlie pl-", but she hung up. She had told him yesterday that this, whatever it was between them, had to be done. She needed it to be over.

* * *

When she entered her front door, Charlize was more than ready to collapse into bed and take a nap. She had passed not one, but two protests on the way home. The situation was worse than she liked to admit to herself. But yet again, life had other plans for her.

"Thank God you're here!", Haley came into the hallway, looking relieved.

"Of course I'm here. Where else would I be?" Charlize said, surprised.

"It's Courtney," Haley said, shaking her head tensely. "I wanted to get her to the hospital, but I can't drive her myself, because I can't move her by myself. She's doing really bad. So I tried to call an ambulance, but all the lines are jammed."

Charlize had rarely seen her friend this upset. "Okay, I'll help you move her. We'll drive her ourselves."

"Haven't you seen the news?" Haley said.

Charlize gave her a questioning look.

"They have started telling people not to leave the house. There are riots everywhere. They are close to calling a state of emergency."

Charlize's jaw dropped. She had realized things were bad, but not _this_ bad. She quickly tried to think of what else to do. They were both nursing students, they had to be able to think of something themselves.

"Okay, let me check on her."

Haley led her to her room. Courtney was lying on the bed, and Charlize went to stand next to her. She looked horrible. Her face was as pale as a sheet, her blond hair wet from all the sweat. Her whole body was radiating heat.

She looked up at Haley. "We have to give her something intravenously," she told her.

"Charlie..we could get in real trouble for that.."

"I know, but you said it yourself, we can't get her to the hospital ourselves and they aren't gonna pick her up. We still have everything here from our practice trial. We have the needles, we have the IV, we-"

"We don't have the meds." Haley stated simply.

"Shit."

They looked at each other, neither saying anything, both of them at a loss for what to do. They quietly went back into the living room and sat down on the couch. The TV was turned on, flashing images of riots and warnings to stay inside.

"Okay, you go and cover her in wet cloths, try to get that temperature down. Try to see if you can wake her up enough to give her some more pills," Charlize said, trying to help as much as possible. "I'll try the ambulance again."

But it was a hopeless case, all the lines were jammed. Chalize continued to watch the disturbing footage on TV as she dialed 911 over and over again, never getting an answer. After Haley was done with Courtney, she joined her on the couch, also trying to get through the line. They sat like this for about an hour, watching the newscast and dialing 911 in silence, when they heard a rumbling from Haley's bedroom.

"Court?" Haley asked, surprised. When she got no answer, she got up and approached her bedroom. Charlize continued to dial 911 from the couch.

"Hey, you shouldn't be up. Lie back down," she heard her roommate say, and then: "Court? Courtney?"

Hearing her roommates' tone, Charlize got up and went after Haley, just in time to see her falling over, Courtney on top of her.

"No! Court - what are you doing?" Haley shrieked, pushing her arms to keep Courtney away from her.

Charlize gasped as she saw Courtney attacking Haley, the sound making Courtney look up into her direction. A cold shiver ran down Charlize's spine. Courtney's eyes were glassy, hazy, and Charlize's mind immediately went back to what Nick had said. _Her eyes - they were open but she was just - she wasn't seeing me._

She knew in that moment that this person, this thing, was not Courtney anymore. In the meantime, Haley's arms were threatening to fail her as Courtney was grunting at her, pushing to get to her throat, shoulder, anything. Charlize had to act quick. She looked around the room, desperate for anything she could hit her with. She decided Haley's bedside lamp had to do, and she quickly grabbed it and hit Courtney over the head with it with all the force she could muster.

The lamp broke on impact and Courtney lost her balance, but only for a second, and soon she was trying to reach Haley again. Haley had used the second to scramble out from under Courtney and was trying to get back on her feet. Charlize hurriedly held an arm out to her, pulled her up, and the two of them sprinted out of the room.

"Do you still have that baseball bat?" Charlize almost shouted at her friend as they were running. Haley looked confused and scared, but she nodded.

"It's in the cupboard in the hallway," she said, and jumped as she realized Courtney was following them outside, her head bleeding from the impact of the lamp. Charlize bolted toward the cupboard as Courtney shuffled towards the two girls, groaning.

When she reached the cupboard, she fumbled to get the baseball bat out, her shaking hands knocking over an umbrella and a broom, and with a deep breath she picked it up with both hands and ran back toward Haley and Courtney.

Courtney was just about to make a grab for Haley again, who was backed up in a corner, when Charlize hit her in the head with full force for the second time in two minutes. Courtney was thrown to the left, the skin on her head popped as she was hit, blood gushing out of the wound.

"NO!" Haley shrieked and made a move to kneel next to her girlfriend. Charlize grabbed her arm and pulled her back forcefully.

"Haley, don't..", she started but was cut off by the look on Haley's face. She was horrified, crying. Charlize heart was hammering in her chest.

"That wasn't Courtney anymore,.." she tried to say more, but both of their focuses shifted toward the body on the ground as it grunted. Slowly but surely, Courtney got up again, turned around, and started walking in their direction. Her face was bloody, she looked dead. Haley whimpered and took a step back.

Charlize composed herself, knowing what had to be done. She had seen it in the video. She lifted the bat and brought it down on Courtney's head, hard. Her body fell, her skull already crushed; but her eyes were still open, and her mouth was still making grunts. Charlize did it again. And again. And again, until eventually, the body stopped moving.

Charlize dropped the bat and covered her moth with her hands. The sight of Courtney, and what she had done to Courtney, was making her sick. There was blood everywhere, on the walls, on the carpet, on her white shirt, the bat was covered in in. Courney's head did not resemble a head anymore.

She slowly turned around to face Haley. She was standing pressed to the opposite wall, her eyes wide in shock. The tears had stopped.

"Haley, we need to leave," Charlize started, trying to suppress the shaking in her voice. Haley's eyes found hers.

"What did you do?!" she asked, incredulously. Charlize came closer to her. "Haley, you saw her. She tried to kill you-" "WHAT DID YOU DO?" Haley yelled this time, but in the next second she raised her hand to her mouth and sunk to a siting position on the wall. She was crying again, hard.

Charlize knelt down in front of her and tried to be as gentle as she could, given the situation. Tears were flowing down her cheeks now, too. "Hales, sweetie, you saw it on TV. You saw what happens. I am so, so sorry," she said. Haley eyes found hers, and she could see that she was trying to understand, that she was getting through to her.

"We need to leave now, you understand that, right?" Charlize asked, and Haley nodded.

"Nick's family is leaving, are you okay with us leaving with them?" she asked, knowing Haley's parents were on the east coast, and she had as little family here as Charlize did herself. Haley nodded again.

Charlize got up and went to the coffee table where she had left her phone. When she picked it up, she noticed she also had blood on her hands. For a second, her breath hitched and her eyes fell on the body in the corner, but she forced herself to push through it. She dialed the number for the Clark's landline, hoping they were still there. After the fourth ring, Madison picked up.

"Travis?" she sounded anxious.

"Madison, no. It's Charlize. Thank God you're still there!" she said, and a sob escaped her lips.

"Charlie, are you okay?"

She tried to push trough it. "Yes, yes, I am. Listen, can Haley and I leave with you?"

Before Madison could answer, Charlize heard a commotion in the background. 'Is that Charlie?' she heard a voice - Nick - say. There was a rustle on the other line, and all of a sudden she was talking to him.

"Are you okay?" Nick asked, urgently.

"We are," Charlize said, letting out a breath she didn't know she had held. "Can Haley and me still leave with you?"

"Yeah, yeah, of course. We're waiting for Travis, we're leaving as soon as he gets here with his family," Nick said.

"Okay, we'll come immediately."

"Be careful," Nick said as they said goodbye. When she hung up, she turned around to Haley. She had gotten up, trying to compose herself. In her eyes Charlize saw that she was distraught, but she tried her best to function.

"We can leave with the Clark's, but we need to leave now. Grab a backpack, grab only the necessary, we're leaving in five," Charlize said and was relieved to see Haley nodding and heading to her bedroom to pack.

Charlize hurried to her room, grabbed a backpack, and started filling it. From her room, she packed some spare clothes, deodorant, a toothbrush and paste, then she went into the kitchen and packed all the food she could easily transport, including a water bottle. She was grateful they lived mainly on canned food and fruits. Broke student life was finally paying off. She was just about to leave the kitchen when she stopped in her tracks, turned around, and packed all the knives except the biggest one. The biggest one she kept in her hand. She then went back to the living room and picked up the baseball bat. She felt nauseous being so close so the corpse.

Just as she had picked up the bat Haley exited her room, ready to go. Charlize went up to her and handed her the knife. Haley took it without question. She understood the situation.

* * *

The situation outside was worse than they had imagined. People were running wild on the streets, breaking store windows, loitering, jumping on cars, setting things on fire. Charlize knew the theory of riots, she knew that if society ended, it ended quickly, but seeing it with her own eyes was something completely different. It was remarkable how quickly men forgot their civilness, how quickly the virus of panic spread. Like there was something buried deep inside humans, something raw and wild, that just waited for society to end, so it could thrive. She understood it. Seeing people riot like this, it was easy, too easy, to turn off logical thinking and give in to panic, to join them, to vandalize. To feel like there were no consequences to whatever crime you committed.

Their plan was to take Charlize's car to the Clark's, but when they reached the parking lot, they found her car, and the others around it, in flames.

"Oh God," Charlize muttered, automatically thinking of all the things she still had stored in the car. This made things considerably more difficult. She turned to Haley.

"We need to walk. It's gonna be about two hours, but I can't think of anything else."

Haley nodded. She really did do a good job of pulling herself together, but Charlize could see in her eyes that her mind was still on Courtney. They'd have to have a talk about that once they were out of danger.

"Come on," Charlize said. She knew how to get to the Clark's on foot, so they started heading north. They maneuvered through the streets like one would maneuver though an obstacle course. Charlize walked up front, Haley behind her. They came really close to being hit by bricks twice, but managed to duck just in time. Once a man grabbed Haley's wrist and tried to pull her away, but she managed to wriggle out of his grasp and they ran for it.

They were almost halfway, the veil of night had fully fallen, and the impact of the riots was even more evident now. The fires seemed to burn brighter and the people seemed to be more out of control. They were walking down the sidewalk of a less crazy street, and Charlize was just about to offer Haley some water when a hand grabbed her arm and pulled her into an alleyway.

Before she knew it, she was pinned against the stone wall, the man who grabbed her using his forearm to choke her. His eyes were wild and she could see that he was infected too, not by the virus but by the riots. The man was taller than she was, bald, and middle aged. He was panting, but his mouth twisted into a smile. Charlize felt his free hand touching her face, of him running his fingers down her cheeks and over her lips.

She was fully starting to panic now. She could barely breathe and no matter how much she struggled, she couldn't get him off of her, he was too strong. She had dropped the bat when he had grabbed her, but she was in such a state of panic that she probably wouldn't have thought of using it anyway; all her mind was allowing her to focus on was the man's face, and his manic smile, and the fact that she couldn't breathe.

The stroking stopped for a while, and she realized he had removed his hand. But as soon as she realized it, his hand was back. He was pressing his finger against her temple, only his finger felt cold and hard. With a horrifying realization, Charlize noticed that what he was pressing against her head wasn't his finger. It was a gun. Her eyes widened in fear.

All of a sudden, the man let go of her, groaning in pain. She leaned forward, hand on her chest, coughing, desperately trying to fill her lungs with air. She was panting, and he had chocked her bad enough for her breathing to be painful. Every breath burned like fire.

When she looked up, she saw the man slowly, menacingly walking toward Haley, raising the gun again. He was holding his other hand to his left side. She then looked to Haley. She was walking backwards, her right hand holding the knife Charlize had given her, only now it was bloody. She must have stabbed him.

Charlize regained enough awareness to notice that Haley looked panicked. She had stabbed the man to get him off of her friend, but judging by her wide eyes, she was not ready to do it again to defend herself, especially when he was pointing a gun at her. Charlize's eyes searched the floor for the bat, and she was relieved to find it almost next to her. She quickly grabbed it, ignoring the pain in her chest, and quickly walked up behind the man. When she was close enough, she raised the bat, mustered all the strength she could with shaking arms, and hit him across the head. As soon as she did, she got a flashback of hitting Courtney across the head, and it made her choke.

Thankfully, the man did not come back after she had hit him. For a second, both she and Haley were frozen in place, panting, looking from each other to the man on the ground. Charlize felt a wave of emotions coming up. Anger, fear - panic even, paranoia, disgust. It was overwhelming. Within the last three hours, she had knocked out two people with a baseball bat. Her white shirt was stained from all the blood. She tried with all her might to suppress these feelings, trying to stall them until they were in a safe place.

"We need to move on," she found herself saying before she could get too wrapped up in her head. She knelt down next to the man and picked up his gun. She had shot a gun once in her life, when her farther had taken her to a gun range, but she thought she remembered enough to handle this one. It was an automatic. She searched the man's pockets for another magazine, but came up empty. She put the safety on and put it in the waistband of her jeans.

They stepped out of the alleyway and continued on down the street. Both of them were silent, trying in their own way to comprehend what was happening. Charlize still could not stop replaying her hitting Courtney. The blood, the head that wasn't a head anymore, hitting the man, his manic look. She tried to push the thoughts away, but it was hard. She did the only thing she could think of and quietly grabbed Haley's hand. Haley did not say anything, did not even look at her, but she gave her hand a gentle squeeze, and that was all the dialogue Charlize needed.

* * *

The closer they got to Nick's place, the emptier the streets were. When they entered his street, they had not encountered another soul in 15 minutes. The street was completely dark - the power went out about an hour ago - and the only thing illuminating the road before them was the moon. It was brighter than Charlize had ever seen it, but then again, she had never seen it in L.A. without the light pollution.

They came up to the Clark's house and Charlize was just about to knock on the front door when Haley grabbed her hand before she could bring it down on the wood.

"Shhh", she said and put a finger in front of her mouth, using her other hand to gesture that Charlize needed to listen. After a second, she heard what Haley meant. There were voices, but it sounded like there was a commotion. She gestured for Haley to follow her. She wanted to go to the back door on the Clark's terrace, intending to follow the noises and not draw any attention by knocking on the door, in case that this was actually serious.

They got closer to the terrace and Charlize realized that the voices came from inside the Clark's living room. People were arguing. The terrace door was open and she tried to get closer. One of the voices was Travis, but she didn't know what was happening. Before she could do anything else, there was a shot.

She bolted around the corner and saw a group of people. The first person her eyes found was a man holding a shotgun. She had never seen him before. He was middle-aged and stern looking, his beard and the little hair he had left was turning grey. His face was serious. He was lowering the shotgun when Charlize saw what he had shot at. Right in front of the open terrace door was a man. He was almost facing her now, the impact of the bullet must've turned his head into that direction. His eyes were hazy, and there was a gaping hole in his cheek. That was where the bullet must have hit him. He then turned to the crowd again and started walking toward them. Travis was closest to him, and Charlize could see him raising his arms, trying to keep the man away from him, all the while still trying to talk some sense into him.

Charlize looked to the man with the shotgun, but he did not raise it again - just stared. Then, her limbs seemed to act on their own accord. Her left hand took the baseball bat from her right hand. Her right hand grabbed the gun from her waistband, her finger releasing the safety. She raised her arm, pointed the gun at the man's head, and before she could think about what she was doing, she pulled the trigger.


	5. The Safe Zone

The silence after the gunshot was so absolute it was almost deafening.

Charlize slowly lowered the gun and held it tight to her thigh, trying to mask her shaking hands. Her eyes found Travis first, since he was standing right in front of the man she had just shot. His eyes were wide as he looked at her in disbelief. His posture was tense and his arms were still slightly raised in defense, as if he had been frozen in the moment.

The other people in the room were Madison, Alicia, Nick, Travis' son Chris and his ex-wife Liza, the man with the shotgun, and another two people Charlize did not recognize. An older woman with tanned skin - Mexican? -and brown hair, leaning onto a younger woman who looked very similar. Mother and daughter, she guessed. Everybody seemed to be frozen in place.

Nick was the first one to move, pushing chairs away to quickly jog to where Charlize was standing. He carefully took the gun out of her shaking hand and threw it to the floor, then repeated the procedure for the baseball bat, then he focused his attention back on her.

"Hey, hey, hey, are you okay?" his eyebrows furrowed, looking worried. Only then did Charlize remember how she looked, her bloodstained shirt. Combined with the gun and the bloody baseball bat she must've looked like a maniac.

She looked down at her shirt absentmindedly, the stain and splatter looking bigger than she remembered. "This-" she swallowed. "It-it's not mine."

Nick placed his right hand under her chin, gently raising her head so she would look at him. For the first time since they arrived, she looked directly into his eyes. They looked darker than usual, intense.

"Are you okay?" he asked again.

She swallowed and wanted to tell him she was fine, there was no reason to worry, but as soon as she opened her mouth, she could tell that her voice would break. She was crumbling under his stare. She closed her mouth again. She shook her head, hardly noticeable, but she was sure he'd catch it. Then she broke eye contact, not wanting to have a meltdown in front of the whole family. She cleared her throat.

"What the hell is happening?" she asked. Her voice wasn't solid, but she was relieved to find that it was steady enough.

"I don't know. I - I don't know," Nick replied, shaking his head. In the background Charlize could notice that the others had started to move again. The man with the shotgun had gone over to the two women Charlize assumed to be his family; Madison started walking toward her and Nick.

"Haley," Charlize said, turning around. Haley was still standing in the cover of darkness outside, but moved inside when her friend called her. She looked steady now, her face serious. "Nick, you remember Haley. Haley, this is Madison," Charlize said, gesturing toward Nick's mother. Madison gave Haley a warm smile.

"What happened?" she asked.

"Long story," Haley stared. "They burned Charlie's car, so we had to walk."

"Jesus," Madison said. "You must be pretty shaken up. Let's get some food in you first."

Charlize and Haley looked at each other, both thinking the same.

Haley turned back to Madison. "We're starving."

They followed Madison into the kitchen, and she prepared some sandwiches. While looking around the room, Charlize noticed that everybody had left, only Alicia was left, and she followed them into the kitchen. Travis and the man she didn't know had carried the corpse outside. While Madison was working, Haley explained what they had seen while they walked, talking about the riots, talking about the fires, the man in the alley, about everything except what had happened before they had left the flat. Charlize was grateful about that.

By the time they finished the sandwiches and Haley asked Madison, Alicia and Nick about what happened at their house, Charlize was not listening anymore. She was lost in thoughts, going over the events of the day, trying to make sense of it. The more she thought about it, the more unbearable it became. With a start, she remembered she was still wearing the blood-stained shirt.

"Excuse me," she said suddenly while getting up already. "I'm gonna go clean up," she added while gesturing toward her shirt.

"Of course," Madison said. "You, Haley and Alicia can sleep in Nick's room tonight. I'll put up the Salazar's in Alicia's room. We'll leave first thing in the morning." Charlize nodded. She assumed the Salazar's were the Mexican family. She took her backpack from where it was in the living room and walked upstairs to the bathroom, moving through the familiar house with ease.

As soon as she had closed the bathroom door, she took of the shirt and threw it into the sink. She turned up the hot water and soaked the shirt, starting to scrub it hectically. The water started turning red as the first of the blood started coming off, but it was only a small part. She knew that she couldn't get blood out of a shirt by simply holding it under water, but she couldn't stop scrubbing. The more she scrubbed, the more urgent she became. Her mind was blank, only occupied by one image. Courtney. Courtney, Courtney, Courtney, Courtney.

There was a knock on the door, but she couldn't react. Her mind was too focused on finishing the task at hand: scrubbing. She didn't notice the door opening, she didn't notice Nick walking up to her until he touched her shoulder.

"Hey, hey, hey," he spoke gently and turned off the tap. Only then did she snap back to reality. She looked at him.

"Hey," he said again and touched her cheek. When he removed his hand, it came back wet. She was crying. She hadn't noticed until now. She let go of the soaking t-shirt and dried her hands on a towel, fidgeting to play down her tears. Nick was quiet. She could see his reflection in the mirror. He stood next to her at the sink, just looking at her, patiently. She realized that she had hoped he would follow her.

"I-," Charlize started and turned back toward him, using her left arm to wipe the tears out of her face. "I killed Haley's girlfriend." She did not manage to hold eye contact with him, instead looked at the floor. She was biting her bottom lip, knowing she could not hold back more tears for long. "It was like you said. Her eyes changed, she was trying to get at Haley so,- so I-I just...," her voice broke and she did not manage to get the words out. _bashed her head in._

"You had no choice," said Nick. "You saved her life."

"You should've seen the look on Haley's face. I-I don't know...even if I had to..I don't know if she can forgive me." Charlize started shaking her head at the last sentence, the tears were flowing freely again.

Instead of replying, Nick moved one step closer to Charlize and pulled her into his body. His left arm went around her shoulder, his hand on her back. When his hand touched her bare skin she remembered that she was only in her bra, but as soon as she remembered, she had already forgotten again as she rested her head in the little nook of his shoulder. Nick's right hand was at the back of her head, stroking her hair, and he rested his chin against the top of her head.

"It's okay," he whispered once in a while as she silently cried.

* * *

Charlize absentmindedly walked to Nick's room. After she had calmed down, he had told her to go ahead, he would clean up. She opened the door and found Alicia already preparing for bed.

"Hi," she said.

"Hey," Alicia replied. "How are you holding up?"

"Oh, I'm fine. I'm just glad we made it here in one piece," Charlize said, trying to sound like she meant it. "How have things been here?"

"Okay, I guess. Nick's been struggling with his withdrawal. It was pretty bad this afternoon, but Mum's stolen some pills from school, to ease him off of it or whatnot." Alicia was shaking her head. "Apart from that, well, you saw the end of it when you got here."

Charlize nodded. Alicia sounded casual as she spoke about Nick, but Charlize wondered how she really felt about it. Alicia had always been the perfect child, and she had to watch her parents, and now only her Mum, worry constantly about her older brother. Charlize wondered if Alicia resented him a little for taking all the parental attention, or if she was sad, or fed up? Alicia was always mature for her age, but was that just who she was, or was it something she forced herself to be, for her Mum's sake?

Charlize laid down in one of the sleeping bags on the floor. She was still wearing jeans and a new shirt, because she didn't know if they had to get up spontaneously. She didn't know what would happen during the night. She was lost in thought when Alicia turned toward her again.

"Have you ever forgiven him?"

Charlize turned her head to Alicia. She was lying two sleeping bags to the left, the middle one free for Haley, and she was looking at Charlize. Her expression was not stern, simply curious.

"Have you?" Charlize smiled at her.

"Touché," Alicia replied and let out a small chuckle. Then, both girls turned their heads away from each other again, each lost in their own thoughts.

Eventually, Nick and Haley came into the room at the same time. They were talking quietly, and Nick offered her to sleep in the bed, but Haley nicely declined and lay down next to Charlize. They tried to sleep, but even after an hour, Charlize could tell that everybody was wide awake. She herself did not manage to close her eyes. Every time she would, she would get flashbacks of the day, and that was even more unbearable than the stinging exhaustion she was feeling. She was wondering if the situation was only this bad in Los Angeles, if other areas of the U.S. were safe, or other parts of the world. Could this be a world wide thing? No, that seemed impossible. Still, she made a mental note to call her parents first thing in the morning.

Eventually, she fell into a light, restless sleep.

* * *

"Who's next?" Charlize asked as Liza, Haley and her walked out of the Coulson's house.

"It's only minor things now, so we can split up," Liza answered. "I'll go check on Mrs. Sanchez, Haley you go re-bandage Griseldas foot, and Charlize you can go and change Hector Ramirez' morphine drip." Haley and Charlize nodded and silently walked off into different directions, Charlize heading to the Ramirez' house, which was right next to the Clark's.

It had been nine days since the power went out. When they wanted to leave on the morning after Haley and Charlize had arrived at the Clark's, they were stopped by the military moving in. Men with rifles and camouflage suits had build up fences and declared the area they were in a safe zone. Charlize guessed that the zone they were in had about 150 people in it, but she could not tell for sure.

The military had put on a strong regime. There were curfews, regulated hours when the power would be on, and no one was allowed to leave the safe zone and enter what they called the _dead zone_. In return, the military provided them with food and limited medical supplies. They had also taken everyone who was in contact with any of the infected, taking them God knows where, they wouldn't tell. Thankfully Travis had buried Peter, the man Charlize had shot who had turned out to be the Clark's neighbor and friend. Madison had lied to the military about the fresh grave, saying their dog had died a couple of days ago, so that the family could stay inside the safe zone.

Even though the military had moved in and the people inside the safe zone were as safe as it got, the atmosphere was tense. A lot of people were restless, since there was nothing to do but wait. Wait to see what happened next, wait to see if they could move out of the safe zone eventually. Many people were also concerned about the military itself, and this was a conflict Charlize experienced first hand in the Clark's house. Travis has been keeping close contact with Ltd. Moyers, who was in charge of the safe zone, and Madison was not happy about it. Travis was supportive of how the military handled the situation, whereas Madison was mistrusting and concerned about their measures. She spend most of her day fidgeting around the house, repainting the living room walls to cover the blood stains, trying to find something to do. Alicia had been spending time with Ofelia, the daughter of the Salazar's. Turns out Travis, Liza and Chris had found shelter in Daniel Salazar's barber shop when the riots started, back when Travis picked up his family in the city. When Griselda, Ofelia's mother, had hurt her food while they were trying to escape the madness, Travis had taken them with him.

Nick had been slowly eased off the drugs with the Oxycontin Madison had gotten from school. She slowly decreased the pills she gave him, so he could get clean. He was doing surprisingly well, and Charlize was surprised about how well he dealt with the withdrawal. She hoped he had finally started to grow up and come through.

Charlize herself has been one of the only people inside the safe zone who was constantly busy. As it turned out, Liza, Haley and she were the only people with any sort of medical background, so they had spend their time going from house to house, checking on sick or injured people, and making an inventory of all the medication they had inside the safe zone. Even though Liza was also only training to be a nurse, she had advised the other two girls to not disclose this information to people. They would feel safer if they thought their caretakers were fully trained. "Don't lie, simply leave some things out," Liza had told them.

When she reached the Ramirez house Chalize knocked on the door, and after a short while Hectors' wife Cynthia opened the door. She looked relieved when she saw her.

"Come in, come in." She opened the door wide and Charlize walked in.

Hector Ramirez was doing bad. He was suffering from acute heart failure, and since they could not leave the safe zone and there were no doctors, all they could do was make him as comfortable as possible. Nevertheless, Cynthia was relieved that there was someone who could help, even though her husband would not get better.

They silently walked toward the bedroom and when they entered, Charlize went straight to work. Hector Ramirez was a middle aged man, maybe in his 50's. He was sleeping and on his right, an IV was dripping morphine into his system. Charlize checked on the man; checked his pulse and the IV.

"He's stable," she told Cynthia. "The morphine's helping."

The first days had been difficult. Charlize felt thrown into cold water, having to diagnose and treat people without supervision. She felt nervous and overwhelmed. But as the days passed, she got more confident. She now knew the patients, knew who needed what, which helped her act like an actual, fully trained nurse.

She opened her medical bag and got a new IV out. Hector's IV needed to be changed every 24 hours. She then started to exchange the old IV for the new.

After she was finished, Cynthia led her to the door.

"You can stay?" The woman said, hopeful. "I made some soup."

"Thank you, but I have other patients to check on," Charlize told her and felt a pang of guilt. It must be lonely in the house with her husband never being conscious, knowing he would die.

"Please take some with you," Cynthia insisted, so they walked to the kitchen and she filled up half of the soup for Charlize to take.

"You must've seen a lot of people like Hector at the hospital," the small woman said while she poured. It sounded more like a question than like a statement.

 _Don't lie, simply leave some things out._ Liza's words rang in her head. She didn't want to lie to this kind woman standing in front of her, but she felt like no matter how she would twist her answer, it would be a lie anyway. So instead of answering, she gave Cynthia what she hoped would look like an empathetic smile.

"Take it," Cynthia said as she handed her the soup. "I don't know what I would have done, Hector is all I have."

"Thank you," Charlize said and put a hand on the woman's shoulder.

"Thank you," Cynthia replied.

With a "See you tomorrow!" Charlize said goodbye and headed back to the Clark's house. When she entered the front door she was immediately greeted by Haley asking from the other room if it was her.

"Yeah," Charlize said as she walked into the living room where Haley was sitting with Griselda. The older woman was sitting on the couch, her head leaned back in the cushions. The injury on her foot was giving her a lot of trouble. Haley had her hair back in a ponytail, and was wearing gloves because she was in the process of cleaning Griselda's wound.

"Do you have a bandage for me? I forgot that Liza has all of mine with her."

"Yeah, sure," Charlize said, but as she wanted to get it, she sighed heavily. "I've left my back with Hector. I'll quickly go get it."

When Charlize got back to the Ramirez' house, Cynthia was outside working in her garden.

"I left my bag inside. I'll just quickly go grab it," Charlize explained in passing as she went back inside.

As she entered the bedroom she stopped in her tracks, because she was immediately struck by the change in Hector's condition. Where his breathing was quiet and easy when she had left, now it was labored and loud. It sounded like he was in pain. Her first thought was that she had made a mistake when she changed the IV. Her hands started sweating and she mentally scolded herself for not paying more attention as she quietly walked around the bed to get to the IV.

However, as soon as she reached the foot of the bed she stopped in her tracks. Lying on the floor, between the bed and the wall, was Nick. His eyes were closed and his hands were resting behind his head. He looked relaxed. Charlize looked at him for a moment, confused, until she looked further down his body. Her heart dropped and at the same time, a hot rage built up inside of her. She had made no mistake with Hector's IV. The reason Hector sounded like he was in pain was that the morphine drip was no longer connected to him, it was connected to a vein in Nick's foot.

"You have got to be kidding me," she said without a trace of sympathy in her voice. Nick opened his eyes, but he did not look fazed at all about having been caught.

"How long?" Charlize asked, exasperated.

"I wasn't feeling so well when Mum cut down my pills, so Hector here volunteered to help me out," he said casually, giving her a confident smile. At this small gesture of him showing no guilt whatsoever, Charlize lost it.

"Get out," she said quietly.

He didn't move. She bend down, pulled the needle out of his foot - with more force than necessary, causing him to hiss in pain - and repeated herself, this time louder.

"Get out!"

"Jeez, okay..okay!" he repeated himself as he got up and Charlize started pushing him towards the terrace door that was connected to the bedroom.

"No, Nick - it's far from okay! You were lying to everybody about finally getting off the drugs and instead you come here, stealing a dead man's morphine!"

Nick still did not understand how serious she was. "Yeah, I mean he's dying anyway and-". Charlize didn't let him finish.

"Get out, you selfish son of a bitch. Do you even care about anyone but yourself?" This was the first sentence that struck something within Nick, and for the first time, the relaxation disappeared out of his eyes.

"Everybody here is pulling together, helping each other," Charlize rambled on. "And you're lying to everybody, hurting other people to get what you want. I've fucking had it with you, Nick Clark. You're acting like a God damn child," "No, no, Charlie-". Nick seemed to have come off his morphine high and grasped the situation. He tried to explain as Charlize pushed him out of the door.

"Stop making fucking excuses! You don't care about me. You don't care about Alicia. You don't care about your Mum. You don't or you wouldn't be so fucking selfish! You only care about yourself." Charlize exclaimed and gave him one final push, closing the door behind him. Nick look startled and a little bit shocked. He made a step back toward the door, putting his hands up on the glass.

"No, no, no, Charlie wait,-"

But Charlize was done waiting. She closed the curtains, not only because she didn't want to see him anymore, but also because she didn't want him to see her cry. She was so angry the tears couldn't help but flow freely. She slowly walked back to the IV and removed the needle Nick had used and threw it in the trashcan next to the bed. She carefully fitted a new needle into the IV, disinfected Hector's skin, and put the morphine drip back where it belonged. Once in a while she used her arm to wipe away her tears.

When Hector's breathing calmed down again, she slowly sank to a sitting position against the wall. She could still hear Nick at the terrace door. She was so angry at him, but more so, she was angry at herself. She should have never started to believe that he was capable of change. He wasn't, and he had proved that today yet again. It was remarkable how easy it was for him to wrap her around his finger. She didn't believe that he meant harm. She believed that in his own, twisted way he did care about her, but as a junkie he was focused on caring about himself first. Always. And if hurting other people meant getting your next fix, that was a price worth paying.

She sat there for a while, dreading to go back to the Clark's, dreading being stuck in a house with him, thinking that this epidemic had pretty damn horrible timing.

* * *

The next morning Charlize got up extra early to get out of the house and make her rounds. She had slept on the couch, because she was still too angry at Nick see him. To her surprise, Liza was also already on her feet.

"You're up early," she said as she walked up to Travis' ex.

"Hey," she smiled at her. "I was just on my way to check on Hector. How did it go yesterday?"

Charlize decided not to mention the whole Nick disaster, so instead she just said: "No changes."

When they got to the Ramirez house they were surprised to see that Cynthia already had another visitor.

"Cynthia, what's going on?" Liza asked surprised. Next to Hector's wife was a younger, taller woman. She had long, dark brown hair that she wore in a ponytail, and she was wearing a black t-shirt.

"Hector is getting the help he needs," Cynthia said with a big smile on her face.

"Who are you?" Charlize asked the tall woman.

"I'm Dr. Exner," the woman said, her tone confident.

"She's from the government," Cynthia added.

"Cynthia has told me all about you," Dr. Exner added.

Oh?

"What did she tell you?" Liza inquired.

"That you are very good nurses. I believe there is supposed to be a third?"

"Haley," Charlize added quietly, and then louder: "Where did you take Hector?"

"Sit down," Dr. Exner said and gestured to the chairs around the kitchen table.

"I want to see him," Liza said. Both of the women did not really trust this Doctor after what they had seen from the soldiers stationed in the safe zone. They were too secretive, too condescending.

"Cynthia was kind enough to show me the chart you have written to keep track of Hector, and I must admit, I am not familiar with some-"

"I should explain some of these," Liza interrupted and Charlize swallowed. They had not known all the professional jargon yet, so they had made their own for some of the things they had done. Dr. Exner must have looked right through it.

"Cynthia, could I speak in private with these two?"

Cynthia nodded yes. "I should get packing anyway," she said with a smile and left the room.

"Where is she going?" Charlize asked, surprised.

"She's wants to be with her husband."

"And where is that?"

"So, you've used a morphine drip?" Dr. Exner asked, ignoring Charlize's question. "Unorthodox."

"We didn't have any nitrates, so we had to salvage from the other neighbors," Liza explained.

"We had to get the pressure off his heart," Charlize added.

"What about the other patients? I've already met four that swear that you three are the reason they are alive."

Charlize and Liza looked at each other, both not knowing what to make of this doctor.

"We're just trying to make them comfortable,-" "You're doing very well for the fact that you are not actually nurses," Dr. Exner said casually.

Charlize swallowed, sweat forming on her forehead.

"Are you?" Dr. Exner asked as neither of the two answered.

"He was dying," Charlize started. "We didn't know what else to do. We needed to get them to trust us so..so that-so that we could help."

To their surprise, Dr. Exner answered with something that Charlize would not have expected. "Can you pretend a little longer?"

* * *

The rest of the morning, Charlize spent going to see the other patients with Dr. Exner. She asked her all kinds of questions, and as far as she was allowed to tell, Dr. Exner answered. Charlize found out that they were bringing the sick or injured patients to a fortified military facility where they had more doctors and could take better care of the patients. This evening, they were going to take all the sick people from the safe zone and bring them there. Then, to Charlize surprise, Dr. Exner asked if she wanted to come and help patients there.

"What?" Charlize asked surprised. They were on the way to the Clark's house to see Griselda.

"We're taking all the sick people tonight. Your help is needed at the facility much more than it is here." They entered the Clark's house, and before she focused her attention on Griselda, she turned to Charlize one more time. "Think about it."

Charlize stood still for a second. When she saw Haley standing in the kitchen, she walked over to her. Haley was alone, wearing some of Alicia's old clothes. A white tank top with a band logo. Her hair was in a pony tail.

"Who's that?" she asked, gesturing to Dr. Exner.

"She's a military doctor," Charlize answered and Haley raised her eyebrows in surprise. "They're taking the patients to a military facility tonight where they have all the injured people. She asked me to come.." Charlize trailed off, still surprised by the offer.

"Let's do it," Haley said immediately. This surprised Charlize even more.

"What?"

"You've seen Madison, and Alicia, and all the others here. They are so restless because they don't have anything to do but wait," Haley explained, sounding casual. "I don't wanna be like that. There we could actually help and honestly? Helping feels pretty good," she concluded.

Charlize thought about that for a while and had to agree with her friend. She did not want to stay here and feel useless. _And be around Nick,_ another, quieter, part of her added.

"Good," she said smiling. "Because I wasn't going to leave without you."

* * *

Charlize had finished packing her backpack with a few spare shirts and toiletries she would need for staying at the military facility. Haley and her would return a week from now with Dr. Exner, to conduct another routine check on all the people inside the safe zone. Before she left the room, she instinctively packed the gun she had stolen from the man in the alley and hid it underneath all the other clothes. _You never knew._

Downstairs she found Madison, Haley and Travis, who were in the living room with Griselda and Daniel, her husband and the man who had been holding the shotgun the day of the riots, waiting for the soldiers to pick up Daniel and Griselda, who were also going to the facility. Charlize and Haley said goodbye to the Clark's, telling them they'd see them in a week, and walked outside to the military caravan that would leave to the makeshift hospital. Charlize had not said goodbye to Nick; he hadn't come to see her and she was still too angry to go look for him. Madison could tell him she had left.

They got up on one of the vans with Dr. Exner and made ready to leave when they heard a commotion from the Clark's house. Charlize looked to the door. The soldiers were carrying out Griselda, but behind was not her husband, but Nick. Charlize's eyes widened in surprise. He was handcuffed and two soldiers were pulling him to another car, pushing him in. His eyes were wide in fear. They must've mistaken his withdrawal symptoms for him being actually sick, she realized.

Charlize instinctively looked back toward the Clark house and she could see Madison standing in one of the windows, looking after her son. As the truck Charlize and Haley were on started moving, Madison's eyes found hers, and she shot her a pleading look.

 _Look after him._

Charlize nodded her head. _I will._

Then the truck left, passed the fence and drove off into the night; into the dead zone.


	6. State of Emergency

Charlize and Haley had been at the military compound for five days. They had slept a total of about 12 hours since then. It was busy, too busy. There were too many patients and too little doctors. They had the patients lined up in rows on cots - an improvised hospital. The ones that did not need immediate care where someone else, Charlize did not know where. Nick was with them, but Dr. Exner would not tell her where these people were. Their job was it to care for the ones that needed urgent care. Exner's words, not Charlize's.

"Charlize!"

The brunette was re-bandaging a leg as Dr. Exner caller her. She looked up and saw four soldiers bringing in another soldier on a stretcher. She carefully put away the bandage to get back to it later, and jogged over to Dr. Exner to help care for the new patient. Dr. Exner was listening to his heart, paused for a second, and then gave the stethoscope to Charlize.

"What do you hear?"

Charlize took the instrument and proceeded to put it in position. She listened carefully and concentrated hard while going through all the possibilities in her head.

"Decreased breath sounds on one side," she said and tried to narrow down the possible causes. She put down the stethoscope and took the man's wrist, feeling for the pulse.

"Elevated heart rate," she continued and thought for one more second before she concluded: "Collapsed lung."

Dr. Exner smiled. "Very good. How do we proceed?"

"We give him oxygen. If that does not help, we have to put in a chest tube." Charlize sounded more confident that she actually was.

"Exactly. Get me oxygen," Dr. Exner instructed and Charlize hurried to comply.

Dr. Exner had been training her and Haley ever since they had gotten to the compound. As much as she distrusted the woman when it came to what the military was up to, Charlize couldn't help but admit that she was a good mentor.

* * *

After they had given the soldier oxygen, Charlize went back to finishing up the bandaging. Afterwards, she walked over to Haley who was in the process of stitching up a laceration on another soldier. Just like Charlize, Haley was wearing a hospital coat and latex gloves.

"Can you cover me for 15 minutes?" she asked quietly when she was close enough.

"Gonna look for Nick again?"

Charlize nodded and Haley told her to go ahead. Ever since Dr. Exner had refused to tell her where the other people, the ones that were taken but weren't urgent, were kept, she had gone off on her own whenever she could find the time. She had always covered for her missing time with either saying she went to get food or she went to sleep. So far, she had been able to check all the floors above theirs without being caught.

This time, she went one floor down. The windowless corridor she was in was completely deserted and, thanks to the unstable electricity grid, the lights were flickering, which gave the whole scene a creepy atmosphere. She carefully walked down the hallway and checked the doors, using her key-card to access the restricted areas, but only found storage. When she opened the last door she was so sure she'd find more storage that she actually gasped in surprise when she saw cots.

She quietly took a step inside the room. It was smaller and emptier than the rooms upstairs. There were no windows either, and only three people were sleeping in cots in this room. The only audible sounds were breathing and the quiet beeping of monitors. The first patient was a a dark, young man with black hair. His forehead was shiny from all the sweat. The person in the next bed was an older man, probably in his 80's with white hair and a white beard. When Charlize looked to the third bed her eyes widened and she immediately went up to it. It was Griselda.

"Why don't you trust me?" a voice behind Charlize said. She turned around and saw Dr. Exner standing in the door. She decided to be honest.

"Because you're not telling me where Nick is."

Dr. Exner looked at her for a moment, evaluating.

"Because it does not concern you."

Charlize was about to argue but Dr. Exner raised a hand.

"Charlize, I know you care about him, but he's not a priority right now. He is with other people that are not urgent. And I am not telling you where they are because I need you up in that emergency room, not with him."

"If he's not urgent then why did you take him in the first place?"

"Because he was sick and we needed to make sure he is not infected."

"He's in withdrawal!"

Dr. Exner gave her a smile. "People say a lot of things to keep their loved ones safe. We can't take the risk."

Before Charlize could answer the two of them were interrupted by Grizelda muttering hectically. Both she and the doctor walked up to the bed. Griseldas eyes were still closed, but her forehead was glazed in sweat and she was rolling her head left and right as she was muttering something in Spanish.

"She's dying," Dr. Exner said.

"What happened?"

"We had to amputate the foot, but it was too late. She's in septic shock."

Charlize looked at Dr. Exner. "Is this what this is? The room for dying?"

Dr. Exner nooded.

"What do you do after they die?" Charlize asked, but Dr. Exner only shot her a questioning look.

"They turn, don't they?"

Dr. Exner nodded again.

"Even if they're not bitten?"

"Even if they're not bitten," the doctor confirmed.

"What do you do?"

Dr. Exner did not answer but instead walked around the cot to a table with medical instruments. She picked up something that looked a little like an over-sized glue gun. She continued to raise it and started pointing it at Griselda's head as the heart monitor's beeping became quicker and quicker.

"What are you doing?"

"Her brain is swelling," the doctor said. "The time varies from person to person, but we know that muscle impulse resumes after death."

She went on to push a little button and gas hissed on the appliance she was holding. "This is a captive bolt pistol. It's used for live stock," she said and turned her attention towards Griselda, whose monitor was flatlining now. "Traumatic brain injury is the only thing that stops them from turning."

Charlize swallowed as Dr. Exner released the trigger, the gun firing. Charlize turned away and closed her eyes, willing herself to emotionally detach herself from the situation. _Everybody turns. Everybody comes back._

Not wanting to show too much weakness in front of Dr. Exner, Charlize swallowed and turned back around to the bed. Griselda was bleeding from a hole in her forehead, but Dr. Exner had moved on to the next bed. She was standing next to the young man, holding up the captive bolt.

"What are you doing?" Charlize asked in surprise as she followed her.

"As you said, this is the room for dying." Dr. Exner replied matter-of-factly.

"But this man isn't in septic shock!" Charlize argued as she looked at the man, who looked physically intact except for the fact that he was sweating immensely.

"No, he isn't."

"And he wasn't bitten?"

"No."

"Tell me if I'm wrong but it seems like he's just having a heavy fever. Why are you killing him?"

"Because we have been treating him for days and he doesn't get better, so we have to assume he is infected."

"You have to _assume?"_

"Charlize," Dr. Exner turned toward her for a moment. "We do not have the luxury of time to do the research. If it looks like a bite, it _is_ a bite. If it looks like the infection, it _is_ the infection."

Charlize swallowed, turned around and left the room. As she heard the bolt go off, all she could think of was that with his withdrawal, Nick looked like he was infected.

* * *

Nick threw up for the third time that day.

"I was wishing we had something to cover the smell of urine," he heard someone say, but he could not concentrate on it. All he could think of was the misery he was in.

He didn't know how long he had been here, but the military had put him - and all the other people they had collected - into small cages. They were in a large hall. The military had build up multiple cages in which they kept their patients, or whatever they were. Captives might be a better word. He was in a cage with three other people, but he assumed there must be a total of about 50, 60 people in the cages.

When his stomach was empty he turned around and sat down against the fence. He wiped his mouth with his arm, closed his eyes and breathed heavily. He felt like he was dying. His whole body was sweaty.

He only had a little bit of water left for the day, but he drank it anyway. Everything to get the vomit taste out of his mouth. The water made him nauseous. Everything made him nauseous these days, even water. He cursed himself for ever starting to use heroin. At the same time, he needed a fix like he had never needed one before.

 _Nick?_ Charlize's voice echoed in his head, accompanied with her face. She had been so angry, so disappointed in him. It haunted Nick. And in the moments he didn't replay that scene, he replayed the scene that happened after. When he got home, he had raided all the cabinets in the house, looking for more pills. He had lied to his mum about using less, he just couldn't stand her worried face. Then she had walked in on him as he was looking for pills. It was bad. What Charlize had done with her words, Madison had done with her hands. She had hit him. And then she had hit him again. And again, and again, until he was crouching in the corner of the room, protectively shielding his head with his arms, eyes wide in fear.

 _Nick?_

He couldn't get Charlize's voice out of his head. His body was torturing him, and now his mind was torturing him as well. He started rubbing his temples exasperatedly.

 _Nick, are you here?_

Nick opened his eyes. Why would she say that inside his head? He looked around and realized that people in the other cages had gotten up, directing their attention to the path outside the cages. Some of them started shouting.

"You can't keep us in here!"

"Help us!"

He followed their gazes to the path, but couldn't see anything.

"Nick?" he heard her again, and a moment later, he saw her. Charlize was walking down in between the cages, looking at each of them thoroughly. He hurriedly crawled to the door of the cage.

"Charlie!" he exclaimed and grabbed the fence. Her eyes found his, and she hurried over and knelt down in front of him. Her fingers found his through the fence. She was wearing a yellow overcoat, one you usually saw in hospitals. Half the hair of her dark brown bob was in a ponytail, and she looked tired. There were enormous bags under her eyes, and her skin was pale.

"Are you okay?" she asked urgently, but she tried to keep her voice down so people would not overhear them.

"Well, as good as it gets," he said and tried to sound casual. His face naturally put on a poker face, something he was so used to doing that it did not even take conscious effort anymore.

"Listen, I don't have much time. I'm not supposed to be here," she started saying. She must have come to work with the doctors, he thought.

"Whatever you do, do _not_ let them take you!" she said, hushed. "Here," she said and started to pull a bottle of water from under her gown and carefully pushed it through the small space of the door. It opened up just wide enough to fit it through before the chain stopped it. The other people who saw started shouting angrily.

"Thank you," he told her.

"If they think you're infected, they will take you. Try to avoid being seen," she urged him again. "I have to go, I'll come back as soon as I can. I'll try to get you out of here!"

Charlize gave his fingers a gentle squeeze through the fence and she made to get up.

"Charlie, wait!" he exclaimed and she knelt down again. She looked at him with kind eyes, nothing left of the anger that was in her face the last time he saw her.

"About last time," he started, but she interrupted him.

"You don't have to,-"

"Yes, I do," he said quietly, and swallowed. As much as he hated to drop his poker face, he did. If she were ever to forgive him, she needed to see Nick, not poker-faced Nick. "I am so sorry. Not just last week," he shook his head. "All these years, I was so selfish, and you were still there. I've never said it, but I was always grateful. And I will never be able to repay you for that."

"This sounds like a goodbye."

"It's not supposed to."

"This isn't a goodbye," she emphasized.

"Okay," he said.

"Okay," she said.

"I'll come back for you," Charlize added as she left.

* * *

Nick had been dozing off when the soldiers came. He didn't know how long it had been since Charlize had come to see him, but he vividly remembered her words. _Do not let them take you._ He curled up in the corner behind the bench, the only piece of furniture in their cage, and hoped they would overlook him.

The soldiers were passing from cage to cage, taking peoples' temperatures with an clinical thermometer through the fence. Occasionally, they would open the fence to get one person out.

When the soldiers reached Nick's cage, the other three people inside automatically got up and went up to the fence, letting the soldiers take their temperature.

"98.6", the one with the thermometer announced as they had finished with the last of the three of them; a very tall, strongly build black man who was wearing a three piece suit. They soldiers were just about to move on to the next cage when one of them spotted Nick.

"Step to the fence," he announced.

Nick got up slowly. He tried to act casual and wiped his sweaty forehead with his sleeve, knowing it wouldn't reduce his temperature but trying nonetheless. When he reached the fence, the soldier with the thermometer held it up against his forehead. No one said anything for a second. Then, the appliance beeped.

"101.1" he announced.

"Pull him," the soldier in charge instructed. Nick desperately tried to think of a way to get out of this.

"The boy's not sick," the man in the suit said to the soldiers.

"Orders," the man in charge said simply. "Everybody with a fever goes downstairs."

He opened the cage door and two of the other soldiers came in, approaching Nick. He retreated as far as he could. "No, no, no - I'm not sick!"

"Come on, let's go."

Nick started panicking as they grabbed his upper arm and started pulling him out of the cage. "No, no, no!" He pushed against their pull.

While Nick struggled against the soldiers, the man in the suit had started bargaining with the soldier in charge.

"You found our last transaction to our liking," he stated.

"Yeah and I ain't giving it back," the soldier said cockily.

"I am suggesting another transaction. Something to round out the ensemble."

In the background, the soldiers had pulled Nick up to the door. "No, no, I'm not sick! I swear!"

"Hold!" The soldier in charge instructed his colleagues while never breaking eye contact with the man in the suit. He was considering the man's offer.

"Let me have the boy. I'll keep an eye on him."

Nick looked at the man in surprise. Was a complete stranger making deals to keep him here?

"Take this as collateral," the man in the suit said and produced what looked like a diamond cufflink from his pocket.

"Where is the other one?"

"Las Vegas, I think," the man said. He was relaxed, cool almost. Like he was used to bargaining and knowing how to play people.

"Yeah, I want them both," the soldier in charge said, and with a head nod he motioned the soldiers to keep going with Nick. They pulled him outside. Forcefully, Nick tried to get his arm out of the soldiers grip. "Get off of me, man!"

"Okay, okay," the man in the suit said, pulled the second cufflink out of his pocket and handed it over.

"No refunds," the soldier said, smugly. "The kid turns, it's your ass."

And with that, the soldiers let go of Nick and pushed him back into the cage. They locked the door with the chain and started retreating with the people they had collected. Nick turned around and looked at the man who had just saved his life.

"Why'd you do that?" he asked, curiously. "You saved my life."

"No, I obligated you," the man said. His voice was deep and confident. He sounded like on of those people who knew every answer to every question. "There is a difference."

Nick sat back down on the floor, leaning against the fence. He did not take his eyes off the man, and eventually, he sat down next to Nick.

"The game has changed. We return to the old rules. And the people who won the last round with their grande latte's and frequent flyer miles are about to become the buffet. I look at you and I see someone who knows the meaning of necessity," the man concluded and looked at Nick. Nick chuckled.

"Well, I'm an addict."

"No, you're a _heroin_ addict."

"That's the gold standard."

"Don't sell yourself short," the man paused for a second. "The soldiers are leaving. I'm gonna require a man with your talents when I make my move." He smiled, mischievously.

"What move?"

* * *

The next day, Nick found out what the man named Victor Strand meant when he talked about his move.

Nick was bashing against the fence. Six days inside this small cage combined with his withdrawal were too much, he was getting claustrophobic.

"Don't draw any extra attention," Strand told him.

"I am losing my mind. I thought the house was bad," Nick groaned, thinking of his Mum's watchful eyes, his sisters face full of contempt as he threw up on the carpet and she had to clean it up.

"Think you're somewhere else with a needle in your arm," Strand suggested. He was about to say more, but they were interrupted by gunshots in the distance. People were shouting and firing rifles outside. Nick turned back around and stared in the direction of the noise.

"What's going on?"

As the power went out and the emergency lights turned on, Strand got up and casually walked up to Nick.

"It's time to go," he said simply and started to check his pockets. His face turned into a slightly stressed grimace as he apparently could not find what he was looking for. Nick smiled confidently and produced the key Strand was looking for from his own pocket. He had taken it a few hours after their first conversation, when Strand had nodded off.

The corners of Victor Stands' mouth turned upward in an approving smile as he took the key from Nick and opened the cage door.

* * *

"20 patients left. 12 critical, 8 stable. All infection free. One Chinook could lift the entire ward and personnel plus two dozen more soldiers, over", Dr. Exner said into the radio.

"Transport inbound, over, " a static voice answered.

As far as Charlize and Haley had been able to find out, they were being evacuated. All the soldiers were retreating from the Los Angeles area. Charlize turned to Haley and started to whisper in her ear.

"That doesn't sound like they'll be taking the people from the cages." Charlize had told Haley about the cages, and about the room for dying, as soon as she had come back.

"Nick," Haley said, knowing what Charlize was getting at. "We'll get him. Maybe we'll somehow manage to sneak him onto that evac heli as a patient."

Charlize nodded, trying to think of how they were gonna do that.

"How are we gonna get the keys?" she asked.

"I'll think of something, don't worry," Haley said confidently.

Before either one could say more, their thought process was disrupted by the power going out and the emergency lights kicking in.

"What the hell?" Haley asked.

They heard shots in the distance.

"Roof," Charlize said and the two girls started jogging to the stairs, taking them to the top level which had roof access. Charlize used her key-card to open the door and they stepped into the fresh night air. The shots were louder now. There was screaming, growling, and the sounds of uninterrupted open fire. They carefully walked toward the edge of the roof so they could look over. Both of them gasped at the same time. Charlize's hand shot up to her mouth in shock.

There were walkers, hundreds of them, pushing against the fence that was enclosing the compound. The soldiers were firing at them, but there were too many. Charlize watched in horror as the first section of the fence broke down. Only a small share of the walkers managed to get in through the hole, but it was enough to spark chaos.

"They're not gonna evacuate if the compound is compromised," Haley was the first one to think of the consequences.

Haley was right. Soon all these dead people would be making their way into the compound, and they had to get out before that happened.

"We have to get Nick now," Charlize said.

"-and then get the hell out of here," Haley finished.

They ran back to the stairwell, hurrying downstairs.

"We're not gonna be able to get the keys," Haley said as they were running.

Charlize thought of a solution. She had seen the cages, seen the chain that locked them. They had to be able to get in there without a key.

"I think I saw bolt cutters in one of the storage rooms downstairs."

Haley nodded and Charlize led her to the corridor where she had found the room for dying and all the storage.

"You check the rooms on the right, I take the one's on the left," Charlize instructed and they got to work.

Charlize checked room by room, but came up empty. She started to slightly panic as she thought about what they would do if they couldn't find a way to get Nick out. And even if they did, how were they gonna get out of the compound if the dead were pouring in?

"Got 'em!" Haley shouted victoriously from another room.

"Yes!" Charlize exclaimed in a relieved laugh.

"Okay let's get Nick and get the hell out of here!" Haley said. She was grinning too.

"Wait-" Charlize said, thinking of something. "We gotta get to our bunk first. I have the gun in my backpack."

"Good thinking," Haley said and they started running toward the personnel room where they slept, which was one floor above them. When they came upstairs they had to pass the emergency room to get to their bunks. Charlize caught a glimpse of the patients, lying in their cots, either sleeping or comatose. She felt a pang of guilt for leaving them behind. She had sweated blood, sweat and tears to care for them, to nurse them, to make sure they survived - only to leave them to die now.

She pushed the thought away.

When they reached the personnel bunks Charlize quickly grabbed her backpack, reached inside and retrieved the gun, tucked it behind the waistband of her jeans on her back, and quickly stuffed the rest of her clothes from her bed into the backpack. She then put it on and turned to Haley, who was ready to go with her own backpack.

They nodded at each other and started running again. Charlize ran up front, leading Haley to the ground floor where she had found the cages the previous day. When she used her key-card to open the door to the big hall, Haley stopped in her tracks as she saw the cages.

"Oh my God," she exclaimed and put a hand over her mouth. "This is where they kept people?!"

"I know," Charlize said and started jogging toward Nick's cage. When she reached it, her heart dropped.

The door was open. Nick was gone.

* * *

Nick was following Strand through a long corridor. Something was definitely wrong, they hadn't come across any people since they had escaped their cage. Still, they were careful. The corridor ended in a bigger room that seemed to have been the entrance to the building. Nick stopped in the door frame. There were two dead soldiers on the floor a bit further into the room, and another person was leaning over one of them, eating his leg.

"That's why the power is out," Nick mumbled more to himself than to Strand. The compound must have been overrun.

Strand had walked further into the room. Apparently he wanted to take the entrance doors as an escape route, but the way was blocked. There were dead one's outside, trying to push in through the glass doors.

Before Nick could ask Strand what he planned on doing now and telling him that he still had someone here he needed to get, another door across the room broke and forcefully opened, and a whole swarm of walkers poured in.

"Shit," Nick said, looking to Strand. The man quickly grabbed a gun from one of the dead soldiers and ran back to Nick. Then, both of them sprinted back down the corridor. Nick reached the door to the stairwell first, but instead of running through it like he planned, he collided with it full force. The handle didn't turn, he couldn't open it.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck," he exclaimed as he continuously tried to push down the handle. He looked to the side. On the wall next to the door was a small key slot and his heard dropped. He needed a key card to open the door.

He turned around and looked down the corridor and saw that the walkers were coming for them. Strand used the gun to fire at them, but not one of them dropped. Nick panicked. He turned back to the door and jumped against it with his full weight multiple times. The door didn't budge.

Just as he was about to give up hope, Nick spotted people running down the opposite corridor through the little window of the door.

"Hey! Hey!" he screamed as he hammered against the glass.

They were coming closer and to his surprise, Nick saw his mother.

"Mum!" he yelled, hoping to get their attention. He did.

Madison spotted her son and hurried to the door that was separating them. Behind her were Travis, Daniel and Ofelia. They must've come to get him and Charlize.

"Nick!" she screamed back through the door. Nick could see them trying to open the door from the other side, but they didn't seem to be able to either. His heart was pounding. He turned around and saw that the walkers had almost reached them. Strand had ran out of bullets. He looked back to his mother, and a terrifying realization came over him. He wouldn't get out of here.

He looked through the window at his mother.

"Go," he mouthed. He could see her shaking her head violently. "No, no!"

Nick put up his fingers against the glass, and his mother reciprocated the movement from the other side. The closest they could come to touching.

"Go," he mouthed again.


	7. Escape

**Thank you to everyone who reviewed! It's amazing to see people being curious about how it goes on.**

 **This chapter is a very short one. It also officially ends season one, so after this we can finally concentrate more on character development and relationships now that it's clear that this is indeed the apocalypse.**

* * *

"Where could he have gone?" Haley said as she and Charlize continued to run through the building.

"I don't know... I don't know," Charlize was shaking her head violently, trying desperately to recreate Nick's movements. Judging by the open door of the cage, Charlize and Haley had quickly decided that everyone inside must have escaped rather than all of them being taken by the soldiers. Before they had moved on to look for Nick, they had freed all the other people from the rest of the cages, giving them a fighting chance to flee from the masses of infected.

They came up to another stairwell and were about to run upstairs when Haley grabbed Charlize's wrist, effectively stopping her. She motioned for her to be quiet.

There were voices coming from one of the lower floors. Charlize nodded and they turned around and headed downstairs instead, following the noises. Charlize's heart was beating rapidly in her chest. They needed to find Nick quickly; the soldiers wouldn't be able to hold off the mass of the dead for long, some of them must already be inside.

As Charlize and Haley came closer to reaching the bottom floor they were able to make out the voices more clearly. There were sounds of thumping as well, as if someone was trying to break through a door. If it weren't for the voices Charlize would have assumed it would be walkers.

"No, Nick!" a female voice exclaimed and Charlize's heart made a leap in her chest. It was Madison's. She sounded alarmed, and when Charlize turned around the last landing of the stairs she could see why.

It wasn't just Madison. There were Travis, Ofelia and Daniel as well. Travis used a bolt-cutter to hit the handle on the double doors to the left corridor, and Madison was standing in front of the left door, pressing her hand against the small window.

Charlize' heart-rate quickened as she saw why they were trying to break the door; Nick was standing on the other side. He couldn't get through because they didn't have a key-card. As she hurried down the last of the steps she saw that behind him was a mass of walkers, closing in on him.

"Move!" Charlize shouted at Travis who was blocking the card reader next to the door. He obliged immediately and took a step to the left. Charlize fumbled to get her key-card out of the pockets of her scrubs and swiped it through the reader. The little light turned red. The door didn't open.

 _No, no, no,_ Charlize cursed in her head. This was the worst time for the reader to malfunction. She swiped again. Red. With shaking hands she lowered the card to her pants and wiped it, her eyes glancing up through the window at the door. The dead people were dangerously close to Nick, five more seconds and they would reach him.

"Hurry!" she heard Madison shout behind her.

She raised the card and swiped it through the reader again, with more force than was necessary, but it worked. The light turned green. _Yes_! Before she knew it, Nick was bolting through the door, but to her surprise, a second man followed him. He was very tall and had dark skin, and he was wearing a very expensive looking three piece suit. Travis tried to close the door behind them, but the infected had already reached it.

"Up!" Haley instructed and everyone ran up the stairs after her. Haley was running first, taking two steps at a time, leading them away from the threat. Nick and Madison followed right after her, then the man in the suit, Daniel and Ofelia; Travis and Charlize made up the rear.

Haley led them up two flights of stairs and then through a corridor to the right. Charlize realized she was taking them back to their improvised emergency room. They were still keeping up a light jog until they reached another double door. Charlize closed it behind her, and the lock clicked into place.

For a moment they stood there silently, catching their breath. Madison was the first one to move. She walked up to Nick and pulled him into a tight hug. He reciprocated the movement and buried his head in her shoulder. The next person to move was Daniel Salazar. He faced Charlize, his mannerisms urgent.

"Where is Griselda?"

Charlize heart dropped. For a moment she had forgotten that his wife had been at the compound as well, had forgotten her lifeless body in the cot, her bleeding forehead.

At her fathers words, Ofelia walked towards Charlize as well. Her long, dark hair was held up in a ponytail, and she was wearing a black cardigan over a gray shirt. Charlize looked from Ofelia back to Daniel, contemplating how to tell them. Then, she started slowly shaking her head.

"I'm sorry."

"No, no!" Ofelia exclaimed, her voice desperate at the realization of what Charlize meant. Her face dropped and tears started running down her cheeks.

"What happened?" Daniel asked. His face was stern, but there was no anger in his voice.

"Dr. Exner had to amputate the foot, but it was too late. She didn't survive the septic shock that followed," Charlize explained.

Ofelia took a step closer to her. There were still tears in her eyes, but her expression had changed.

"I want to see her!" she said angrily.

"There's nothing left to see," Haley answered from behind them before Charlize could open her mouth. All of them turned to Haley, surprised at her words.

"They burn the dead so that the infection doesn't spread," Haley explained. Charlize was taken aback at her friends explanation. She had not known. Only now did it occur to her that she had never wondered what the soldiers did with the dead bodies.

Ofelia covered her mouth with her hands as a sob escaped her lips, and Daniel went up to her and embraced his daughter.

Charlize turned away from them, giving them as much privacy as she could so they could mourn their loss. She saw that Madison had gone over to where Haley was standing. Travis was standing in a corner with the man in the suit. Nick was standing a step or two behind his mother, and Charlize started walking toward him. He was wearing a beige jacket over a white shirt, both dirty. His hair looked messy and she could see that he was still sweating. She wondered whether it was from the running or from his withdrawal.

"Are you okay?" she asked as she walked over to him. Instead of answering, Nick took a step forward and put both of his arms around her. He held her tight and pressed his temple against hers. She mirrored the gesture and put her arms around him, using her right hand to gently stroke his back.

"It's okay," she whispered.

"I'm sorry," he whispered. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry."

* * *

Charlize took a deep breath before opening the heavy door to the parking garage. On the way to the emergency ward Travis had told them that Alicia, Chris and Liza were waiting on the parking deck with three cars, packed and ready to head east. Then, Nick told them that the man he was with was called Victor Strand, and he had saved his life. Afterwards, there was no time for talking. They had found Dr. Exner in the infirmary. She had been sitting down on one of the cots, holding the captive bolt in her right hand. While Haley and Madison had been raiding the cabinets for all the medication they could carry, Charlize had tried to talk the Doctor into coming with them. "There is nowhere to go," was the only thing the woman had answered. She was eerily calm, her face pointed straight ahead. Not once did she look at Charlize while they were talking. She was lost. When Charlize realized that the room was too quiet, she saw that Dr. Exner had already killed all of the patients with the bolt. There was no more heavy breathing, no more sounds from heart monitors. It was the merciful way. Begrudgingly, she let Nick pull her away when they had gathered all the supplies. It was hard to leave the Doctor, and while she was taking a last look back, she had seen that Dr. Exner was raising the captive bolt and pointing it at her forehead. Charlize shuddered.

Now, Charlize was pushing all her weight against the heavy door, forcing it open with a bang. She immediately raised both of her hands, pointing the gun at whatever scene might await her at the other side of the door. But there was nothing. She tentatively took a few steps into the parking deck, looking left and right, but it was empty except for two cars. One was Madison's, the other one was Travis's truck. With a relieved sigh she dropped her gun, put the safety in place and tucked the gun back into the waistband of the jeans she was wearing underneath her scrubs. Travis hurried past her.

"Chris?" he shouted. "Liza?"

For a moment, there was silence. Then, a small door opened at the opposite site of the garage and Chris poked his head out. Visibly relieved, he came out, followed by Liza and Alicia. He jogged to his father, and when the two groups met in front of the cars, Chris told them that the third car they had come with had been taken by soldiers. He was visibly shaken, even though he tried to hide it. His left eye was starting to bruise. One of the soldiers must've struck him. Alicia was standing with her mother, exchanging a relieved hug. Charlize looked from person to person, appreciating for a moment that all of them had made it out alive; that against all odds, Haley and her had found Nick, and the rest of the family had found them. She wondered how Madison and Travis had found the compound when Travis told the group that it was time to leave.

They did not get far.

Charlize turned around and started heading to the truck - Haley walking to her left, Nick walking to her right - when a man stepped out of the shadows of Madison's car. He was wearing cargo pants and a dark green shirt, it was obvious he was military, but his right forearm was heavily bandaged. Charlize stopped in her tracks, as did the others. The man was carrying a gun and was pointing it at the group. Charlize's heart started pounding in her chest again. The man looked angry. Did he want one of the cars? She was studying his face, his arm, when all of a sudden, he disappeared. Charlize had concentrated so hard on him that for a moment, she didn't realize that the reason she could not see the man anymore, was that Nick had slowly taken a few steps to the side, placing himself in between her and the gun. She tentatively took one small step to the right, so she could see the man over Nick's shoulder. Charlize saw now that the soldier was pointing the gun at Daniel Salazar.

"Salazar," he said. His voice was deep. He sounded like he was threatening Daniel. How did they know each other?

"Andy?" Ofelia asked quietly. She had been sitting on the floor, leaning against a pillar, but now she was slowly getting up. Charlize wondered if this was the soldier Ofelia had kept sneaking off with to make out back in the safe zone.

The soldier took a few steps forward, his eyes glued on Daniel. He moved one of his fingers and the gun cocked.

"Ofelia," Daniel said and raised one of his hands in defense. He slowly moved to his left, trying to put his body in front of Ofelia, like Nick had just done with Charlize, but the distance between him and his daughter was too great.

"Andrew, put the gun down," Travis said. He tried to sound as persuasive as he could, but it did not seem to work on Andrew. "You don't have to do this, okay?" Travis continued. "What are you doing? Just put the gun down."

"You don't have do to this," Daniel echoed. His sounded more stern and less pleading than Travis.

The words did not bother Andrew. He kept moving forward slowly, threateningly, like a predator stalking his prey. Nobody else moved. Then, everything happened too quickly. In the last moment, a menacing smile formed on Andrews lips, and a second later he moved his arm to the right and released the trigger. Ofelia was quick enough to anticipate what he was doing and ducked just in time.

But behind Ofelia, Liza dropped to the ground. Everybody was frozen in shock as her white shirt turned red; her eyes open but not seeing anymore.


	8. Abigail

**Thanks again for the reviews! Especially to the guest who asked me to update again. I'm sorry I'm so slow that you have to keep re-reading! Hahah, I'm glad you like it though! I hope the updates can live up to the expectations. :)**

* * *

Nick stared out at the vast ocean. The water extended into all directions, engulfing them, with no land in sight anywhere. The wind was softly running through his hair. They had been on the _Abigail_ for days, heading south into the direction of San Diego, hoping for a safe place where the world wasn't overrun by walkers. The first day had been the worst. After leaving the military hospital they had headed straight to Victor Strand's place. An enormous, modern, expensive property right on the coast. There, Strand had revealed his plan: _Abigail._ Just as his suit and his house, the _Abigail_ looked expensive;a luxury yacht, stocked to feed them for at least a couple of weeks, according to Strand. The further they had headed into the ocean that night, the more the destruction of Los Angeles had been evident. The city was in flames, the fires spreading along the coast as far as he could see in either direction, the flames vibrant red against the dark night sky. The following day they had encountered smaller boats on the water, some overcrowded, some too meager to make it far. All of them had shouted to them for help, but Strand had refused. "I filled my mercy quota," he had said, and that was the end of the discussion. Even Nick had told him to reconsider, but to no end. Since the third day they had not seen any other boats. It was just them and the endless sea.

Nick was pulled from his thoughts when his mother came up to his left. She didn't say anything, simply turned her face to the sun and closed her eyes, soaking in the sunlight. For a moment they were silent. Eventually, Madison spoke. "Are you okay?" she asked, her voice soft. Nick nodded. "No cravings?" she added and he gave her a small smile. "No, Mum." The week in the military hospital had been bad, and more than once Nick had thought he wouldn't live through his withdrawal. Now on the boat, it had gotten better. He still craved a fix sometimes, but it was not nearly as bad as it had been back in the cage.

"I feel strange, Mum," Nick said after another silence, looking over at her. Madison turned her head to her son, her eyes immediately taking on a concerned look. He looked around and gestured to the sea and to the boat, and Madison chuckled. "We're spinning off the planet," she said, facing the water. "We have no idea where we're going." "That's the thing," Nick said, following her gaze to the horizon. "I never knew where I was going. I have been living this for a long time. And now everyone is catching up with me." He released a breath. "Strange," he added again, turned around and walked away.

He passed Daniel who was fishing and headed through the glass door into the living room of the Yacht. Alicia was sitting on the couch, manning the radio as she had done the last days, waiting for any news from the outside world. He walked through the small hallway to the stairs which led to the lower deck, where all the sleeping cabins were. He followed the small hallway almost to the end and stopped in front of the second to last door on the right. Carefully, he brought down his knuckles against the wood. When there was no answer, he knocked again. Eventually, a quiet grunt from the other side was his signal to enter. He opened the door just enough to put his head through. Charlize looked up at him when he did.

"D'you mind?" he asked. Charlize was sitting on the bed, a big book in her lap. It was a medical book, though Nick didn't know much more about it. Charlize had taken it from the infirmary back at the hospital, and she had been reading it ever since they had been on the boat, only ever stopping to eat or nap. As she nodded okay, she placed a small paper in the book, marking her page, and placed it on the nightstand.  
Nick entered the room and closed the door behind him. Charlize eyed him while he was moving across the room and propped himself up on the bed next to her. She was wearing black leggings and an over-sized white shirt, and there were big, dark bags under her eyes. "How long has it been since you slept?" he asked. Charlize rolled her eyes at him. "I sleep enough, Nick," she said with a sigh. "But this is a lot of stuff." She motioned to the book.  
For a moment, Nick simply looked at her, studying her face. When he spoke again, his voice was quieter and more gentle. "You couldn't have saved Liza."  
Charlize looked away, directing her gaze at the door instead. He could see her swallowing. "I know," she said eventually. "But I can try to save the next one."

They had taken Liza's body when they left the military hospital, to allow Travis and Chris to say goodbye, and to give Liza as much of a funeral as they could arrange. They had only done it today. Travis had said some words, kindnesses about Liza, about the family they had been. When it was Chris' turn, instead of speaking, he suddenly, and almost violently shoved his mother's body into the sea, storming off after. Liza's death had taken him the hardest, understandably. For a moment, Nick wondered how he would react if Madison died.

"We're save on the boat," Nick told her, trying to sound comforting. After being silent for a while, Charlize started laughing. Nick turned his head to her, surprised. She was shaking her head, laughing. "This is actually happening," she started. "People are eating people." She continued to laugh and Nick smiled. "The end of the world," he said. Everybody copes in his own way, and laughing was one of the better options. "Did you talk to your parents?" he asked when she stopped laughing. She nodded her head as she answered. "Back when we were at the safe zone. They were okay then, no incidents in Europe. I haven't been able to reach them since," she finished. Nick nodded and they were silent again, each lost in their own thoughts. After a moment, Nick was pulled from his current train of thought when Charlize slowly felt for his right hand with her left, intertwining her fingers with his. It was a simple, innocent gesture, and when Nick turned his head to look at her, her gaze was still fixed on the wall ahead, her head leaned casually against the wall behind her, her mind somewhere else. They sat like this for a while - their fingers intertwined, Charlize looking at the wall ahead and Nick looking at her. If she noticed, she didn't seem to mind. Her brown hair hang casually just above her shoulders, and Nick was almost close enough to count the light layer of freckles that covered her cheeks. He knew them so well he could recreate their pattern from memory.

"Do you remember our first date?" Charlize asked eventually, her voice quiet and gentle. She turned her head and her eyes found his, a small smile playing on her lips. Nick pressed his eyes shut, faking a tortured expression while slightly smiling. "Don't remind me," he said, remembering too well. She giggled lightly at his reaction, and the sound made his heart flutter. It reminded him of his Junior year of high school, when they had first started dating and they would spend hours just lying in bed, talking, kissing. She had giggled like that a lot back then, when they had been happy. Nick had tried to ask Charlize out for six months without success before she finally agreed. They had been friends, and even she couldn't have denied their chemistry, she had been reluctant, because she was two years older than him and one year ahead of him in school. When she had finally said yes, Nick knew he couldn't, _mustn't,_ blow the one chance he had with her. He thought one of the most important parts was making sure she would forget about the age difference, so he had donned black jeans, a white button-down shirt, and borrowed a black bow-tie from his father. Now, he blushed just thinking about it. He had picked Charlize up with a bouquet of lilies in hand, and she had opened the door wearing Converse and a black tank top.

"You looked so cute," Charlize smiled.  
"Stop it," Nick laughed, and she joined in. "I'm serious. That bow-tie was amazing. Maybe not the most appropriate choice considering the fact that _you were taking me to the county fair..."_ "Stop," Nick groaned, burying his face in his free hand, which made her laugh even harder.

When she stopped laughing Nick turned his face back to her, casually leaning his head against the wall. Her posture mimicked his, and she was smiling at him, not teasingly this time, but genuinely. "I loved every minute of that day," she said quietly, more sober. He thought back to their date at the fair. They had shared cotton candy, he had won a small teddy bear at the Balloon and Dart game and given it to her, and in the evening, while they were riding the Ferris wheel, he had kissed her for the first time. He thought about all that as he was looking at her now, in this cabin on the _Abigail_ , during the end of the world. So much had happened since then. Nick studied her face, her smile that exposed a little of her teeth, the strand of her falling onto her cheek, her blue eyes, looking almost gray in the low light of the cabin. When he spoke, his voice was quiet, full of nostalgia and regret. "You're so beautiful."

The smile disappeared from her lips slowly, but not from her eyes. Her expression sobered up, and her eyes focused on his deeply, as if she were trying to see right through him. When she slowly started moving her head forward, Nick's heart began beating quicker in his chest. When she was so close that their noses almost touched, she raised her right hand and put it on his cheek. Her fingers were cold on his skin, but he didn't flinch. His eyes were on her, and everything else in the room disappeared; the bed, the dresser, the _Abigail_. Everything was gone but her. She moved her thumb on his cheek, gently stoking the skin. Then, everything happened fast. Charlize moved her hand from his cheek to his neck, pulling him closer, erasing the distance between them, and her lips crashed into his almost desperately.  
The kiss was hurried, but not in a bad way. Is was full of longing, and nostalgia, and the need to feel alive. Charlize's lips felt hot on his, and it was at the same time familiar and completely new. Nick's heart was racing and he felt a rush of adrenaline that he hadn't felt in weeks, months even. Their bodies moved in unison and familiarity, their intertwined hands letting to to find other places to hold on to. At the same time, Nick hadn't kissed her while he was sober in almost two years. The feeling was intense, and he couldn't get enough. With one swift movement, his left arm grabbed her back and pulled her down so she was lying on her back, while simultaneously moving on top of her, kissing her urgently. His mouth moved from her lips to her neck, leaving a trail of kisses down to her collarbone. A soft moan escaped her lips when he did, and it made him need her even more. He moved his upper body up, sitting up on his knees, and with one swift movement he pulled his shirt over his head and threw it to the side. Charlize's hand moved to his arm and pulled him back down, kissing him, biting his lip, her hands moving along his side and back, making him shiver in a good way.  
All of a sudden she pushed him off of her, successfully flipping their positions. Her right hand moved to his face, stroking along his cheek and grabbing his neck, then moving to kiss him again, kiss his neck, his chest, his stomach. Nick closed his eyes and exhaled sharply as she reached the sensitive spot underneath his belly button, and she was just about to open his belt when there was a knock on the door. Both of them froze.

"Dinner's ready," Haley shouted from outside, and thankfully they could hear her footsteps departing again as soon as she announced it. Nick looked at Charlize. She was still sitting on top of him, but he knew that their moment was gone. To his surprise, Charlize leaned down one more time, kissed him gently, and moved off the bed. Bending down she threw him his shirt from the ground and went to the door. When she opened it, she paused in the door frame and turned around to look at Nick, holding out a hand for him.

* * *

The table was so full of food that Nick wondered how Strand could store that much food on his yacht that they were able to eat so much so often. Travis, Daniel, Madison, Alicia, Ofelia, Haley and Strand were all there, seated along the big oval table that was positioned right next to the three glass walls that enclosed the room on the top deck. Strand was arguing with Alicia at the other end of the table when Nick sat down next to Ofelia.

"What happened?" he asked.

"Alicia has been talking to someone on the radio the last couple of days and apparently today, she told him our position," the girl stated simply. He wanted to ask more, but he was interrupted by Travis shouting for Chris. Nick turned around. The boy was nowhere to be seen. Nick assumed he'd been pretty on edge ever since the incident at the improvised funeral earlier, but before he could contemplate it more, they heard a big splash coming from the rear of the yacht.

"Chris?" Travis shouted, concerned. Nick was closest to the door, so he quickly jumped up, running out of the room onto the deck, following the sound of the splash. Chris was in the water, 20 feet away from the yacht. Further behind him Nick saw the remains of an overturned boat, floating in the distance. Without thinking about it, Nick took of his shoes, jumped after Chris and swam up to him. He could hear his mother shouting his name from the yacht, but he ignored it.

"What are you doing man?" Nick asked as he came up to Chris. The boy just shrugged. "I just wanted to swim," he said and turned away, swimming.

"Is he okay - Chris!" Travis was shouting from the boat and Nick turned on his back, floating. "Come on in," he shouted, sounding casual. "Water's fine!" He turned back onto his stomach and dived.

The water was fine indeed. It was warm and soft on his skin, even though he was swimming in all of his clothes. He felt almost relieved to be away from the boat. As nice a yacht as it was, it was a restricted space, and with ten people it got crowded quickly. Under water, he moved closer to the overturned boat, diving deeper down. When he got closer he saw a figure deeper down in the water, moving slowly. _Walker,_ he thought. Against his better judgement, he moved closer. It was a man, he thought. Its skin was bloated from water, and its eyes wide but without recognition. Its arms flailed aimlessly into Nick's direction, and Nick found himself strangely fascinated by it. He couldn't stop looking, and dived further down so the walker almost reached him with his hands. When he ran out of breath, he swam back to the surface and was greeted with shouting from the yacht. He looked back. Travis was pulling Chris out of the water, and Madison was shouting for him to come back. Nick was just about to swim back when he heard a clanking sound coming from the overturned boat. He looked from the boat to the yacht and back to the boat.

"I think I heard someone," he shouted before diving back under. In quick strokes he swam underneath the boat, only coming up again under the hull. There was some light inside, and after his eyes adjusted, Nick saw that it poured in through dozens of bullet holes that decorated the hull. Dozens of objects were floating on the water inside, and one item caught his eye. He swam forward and reached for it. It was the logbook. Before he could look at it more thoroughly, the clanking sound appeared again and he wheeled around in the water. The sound came from a dead woman, clanking against the hull of the boat as she moved toward Nick. She was close enough for him to have to keep her away with his arm. His hand pressed on her forehead, and he studied her face. The skin felt spongy underneath his touch, and her eyes were empty. _Just like Gloria's,_ he remembered. With a shudder, he pushed her away and quickly dived back from under the boat, returning to the yacht.

On the deck, Travis ushered him to hurry. When he reached it, the threw the logbook onto the deck and let Travis help him back up. His clothes drenched the ground as he stood up.

"Okay, go!" Travis shouted as he was safe on deck, and Nick furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. The boat sped up underneath him, and he followed Travis inside. The others were all assembled in the wheelhouse, where Strand navigated the _Abigail_.

"What's going on?" he asked, drying his hair with one of the towels Charlize had handed him when he came in. Strand's expression was grave when he turned around to face him.

"Whoever did that," the man said, pointing to the overturned boat with all the bullet holes, "they're coming back."


	9. The Quiet Before The Storm

**I was wondering why my traffic graph was blowing up, and then I realized the new season started! Somehow I got it in my head it would only start in August, so that was a lovely surprise.**

 **Again, I want to apologize to everyone for the long periods in between chapters. I haven't given up on this story, but I spent the last few months writing my 90-page graduation thesis, so I was all tapped out on energy to write. That being said, my thesis is handed in (yay me!) and I hope I'll manage to keep up a more regular schedule with updating. :)**

 **Oh also, fyi. There's sex in here, so whoever is uncomfortable with reading that might want to skip over it. It's pretty evident where it starts. Might be time to raise the rating to an M.**

* * *

"What?" Haley exclaimed.

"I almost slept with Nick," Charlize said in a hushed tone.

"I heard you the first time," Haley laughed, her hair blowing from the ocean breeze. "How the hell did that happen?"

"I don't know," Charlize said, lowering her head into her open palms and rubbing her forehead. The two women were sitting on one of the cushioned benches on the top deck of the yacht. It had been a day since they noticed that they were being followed on the radar, supposedly by the people who destroyed the boat in which Nick had found the logbook; and so far, they had been able to outrun them.

"Oh, of course you do," Haley said. "For weeks you could've cut the tension between you with a knife."

"Yeah I know, but that's not it," Charlize replied, gazing out at the ocean. "It's just..Urgh, I don't know..Do I really want to go there? Again?"

"I can't answer that for you," Haley said, sympathetically. "How did it feel?"

"Really good," Charlize admitted, looking at her best friend. "But was that because I wanted it, or because it's the fucking end of the world and I just needed to feel _something?_ Was it because I'm still in love with him, or because it's familiar?" She shrugged. "I couldn't say."

"You think too much."

"Of course I do," Charlize said, not responding to Haley's light tone. "It's Nick."

"Charlie," Haley started, more sober. "If this were our normal life back in L.A., I would kick your ass for even considering it. But this is far from normal. And consider this: This is the first time since you two broke up that he's clean. And he does seem like he's doing better."

Charlize thought about that for a while, contemplating Haley's words. "I just can't shake the feeling that something is going to happen again, that he's gonna disappear again. Not even necessarily physically - it's a boat, where should he go, but that he'll disappear into himself again, shutting me out."

"What if he won't?" Haley countered. "What if the end of the world changed him, just like it changed you, and me, and everyone on this yacht?"

For a moment, Charlize simply looked at Haley. Then, she started laughing lightly. "You are the last person I would have expected to be on team Nick."

Haley smiled. "Well, it can't be easy for him either."

Charlize hesitated, then: "What do you mean?"

"Think about it," Haley started. "Let's assume for a moment that he actually has changed and has gotten better. The last two years, he has been fucking up big time. Let's assume he regrets it. Maybe he's ashamed. Now on this boat with its limited space, everywhere he looks, he sees someone he's hurt. He sees Madison and he remembers how much he fucked up. He sees Alicia, he remembers how hard it must have been for her. He sees you and he remembers how much he hurt you."

"Yeah, but you can't fix the relationships you've broken by _not_ seeing the people you've hurt," Charlize said defensively.

"Of course not," Haley responded calmly. "But this is hardcore. There's barely space to withdraw for some alone time. And fixing the relationships is not just work for him, it's going to be work for everyone. Think about it. How many times since we have been on this boat have you, or Madison, or Alicia, asked him if he's okay, how bad the withdrawal is, if he craves a fix?"

Charlize was silent.

"It's just so easy to fall into old patterns. The more you - and I'm not saying that you are, but the more you worry, and the more you maybe mistrust him, and question him, the more he falls back into the old role of being the victim, of being defensive, and of not being honest anymore."

Charlize was still silent, staring out at the ocean, contemplating. Eventually, she stirred. "Well, shit."

"What?"

"You're right," she admitted.

A smile spread on Haley's lips and she shrugged. "I usually am."

For a moment, they are quiet, both lost in their own thoughts. Behind Haley, the sun was reflected brightly in the ocean, no cloud to be seen in the sky. Haley's long, black hair was falling loosely over her shoulders and moving in the wind. Her skin had visibly tanned in the week they had spent on the yacht. Her eyes were no longer fixed on Charlize, but on the endless blue water behind them.

"What if they catch up to us?" she said eventually.

Charlize had wondered the same multiple times since the day before, sitting outside, staring at the ocean behind the boat, waiting for another boat to appear on the horizon. "I hope we don't find out," she replied.

With an agreeable nod Haley got up, her white shirt flowing in the wind, and walked back to the open door leading through the yacht's living room and kitchen to the stairs that lead to the lower floor.

"Oh, and put on some sunscreen," Haley shouted while she was walking away. "You're too damn white to be in the sun all day."

"Oh my God," Charlize exclaimed in fake exasperation and spontaneously threw one of her slippers after Haley. The raven haired girl side-stepped the shoe with a sly smile on her face, and disappeared through the glass door.

* * *

Charlize was walking along the small corridor that led to the yacht's cockpit. The carpet felt rough under her bare feet, and since she was only wearing a t-shirt, her arms felt chilled in the cool night, even inside. Her bob was slowly but surely growing out, and her hair felt tangled and dry from spending all her time on the ocean. Inside the cockpit she found Victor Strand and Travis. Victor was wearing a black hoodie and a black beanie, and he was standing behind the wheel, staring at the boat's radar with a concentrated expression. Travis was sitting on bench on the right side of the room, his legs up and lying across its cushioned surface, his back leaned against the wall defining the bench's right end. His eyes were closed. Outside it was dark except for a few starts shining dimly against the black sky.

Charlize came up next to Victor. "Are they still following us?" she asked quietly, staring at the radar.

"Mhhm," he affirmed, and then pointed at a small green dot at the edge of the radar. "And they're gaining on us, too."

"How much longer can we run?"

"Not long," Victor said in his deep voice. Its tone was almost calming, despite his words. "We're going to have to find an alcove, or something else to hide."

"Chris!" Travis exclaimed from behind them, snapping out of a dream. When Charlize looked at him his eyes were wide in confusion, his mind still stuck in the hazy state between sleep and consciousness, and there was a thin layer of sweat on his face, despite the chill of the night air.

"He was up on the deck with Ofelia the last time I saw him," Charlize said gently. Travis looked up at her, the sleep disappearing out of his dark brown eyes. "Yeah...," he said, shaking his head lightly. "I'll go check on him." And with a small grunt, Travis lifted himself off the bench and walked out of the cockpit.

Charlize left shortly after, walking down the corridor to the stairs that led downstairs. It was so cool now that she crossed her arms in front of her chest while walking, trying to rub some warmth back into them. She opened the door to her cabin without consideration, and was surprised to find the small light on the nightstand already turned on, and someone sleeping in her bed. For a moment, Charlize stood still in the doorway, too surprised to move. Then, she smiled.

Nick was curled up under the blanket, his eyes closed, the peaceful expression of sleep on his face. No poker face, no pain, no yearning - just Nick, in his purest form. It was then and there that Charlize realized that no matter how much she contemplated with Haley, and no matter how doubtful she still was, she had already made up her mind. She had made it up a long time ago. It occurred to her there in that small cabin, at the end of the world, that she was hopelessly and irretrievably in love with Nick Clark.

Charlize quietly walked over to the bed, lifted the blanket carefully, and slipped in next to Nick. He woke up from the movement, though he didn't open his eyes. He simply moved closer to her and put an arm around her. They were lying face to face, chest to chest. Charlize noticed that he was not wearing a shirt. "Mhhh," he murmured unhappily. "You're cold."

"I was outside." He did not reply, only rested his head in the nook between her chin and her shoulder, and continued to sleep. Charlize softly stroked his hair with her right hand, suddenly wide awake.

"Babe?" she whispered eventually.

"Mhh?" his breath was hot against her skin.

"I'm sorry."

Nick did not reply. He raised his head enough to be able to look her in the eyes, his eyes opened halfway, sleepy and confused.

"I've realized that since we're on the boat I've still treated you like I treated you the last couple of years," Charlize started, turning onto her back to avoid eye contact. "Like you were fragile, and would relapse any second. I didn't trust you, I think, mainly because of that stunt in the safe zone, probably. But I've never once acknowledged how good you were doing. You're here and you're present, not just physically, and you were trying to fix things, and I only looked for red flags. That wasn't fair."

"Well, that isn't entirely true," Nick said, his voice still groggy from sleep. "You found me in the military compound and tried to save me without even wanting to hear an apology. I'd say you've been pretty supportive."

"Well, how I act and what's in my head isn't always consistent," Charlize said, not unkindly. "Maybe that apology was something I needed to say more than it was something that you needed to hear." She was silent for a moment, then she turned her head back to Nick. "I'm going to promise you something now, and then I'm going to ask something of you."

"Okay." Nick's eyes were locked with hers, more alert now.

"I promise you that I'll trust you from now on. I won't ask you daily how you're holding up, or how bad you're craving a hit, or how you're dealing with the withdrawal. That stuff is in the past, and God knows we need to start looking ahead. But I'm asking you to be honest with me. If you feel like shit, talk to me. If you've fucked up, talk to me. Even if you haven't, just talk to me," Charlize said, and then quieter: "don't shut me out."

Nick moved his head closer to hers, so that their noses were almost touching. Charlize could feel her heart pounding in her chest, not from his closeness, but from her honesty, her confession. Then, Nick moved his left hand to her neck, and gently kissed her forehead. "I promise."

Charlize felt a knot in her chest dissipating, and she chuckled lightly. "So this is it?"

"This is it," Nick replied, and even if she would not have seen him then, she would have been able to hear the smile in his voice. "No more fuck ups's," Nick added.

"You better," she teased.

"Oh my god, you couldn't even keep your promise for five minutes," Nick said exasperated, but he was laughing.

"Oh, stop!" Charlize responded and pushed him, so he rolled over on his back. She realized that she felt at ease, for the first time in a long time. She moved closer to him then, and he looked at her when she did. "Nick Clark..," she whispered and leaned closer, closing the distance between their faces. His lips felt warm and familiar on hers. The kiss was not like the kiss they shared two days before; it was not urgent, or desperate; it was warm, and slow, and loving. Charlize opened her mouth slightly, allowing his tongue in, she gently bit his lip, and all the while they etched closer to each other, until it felt like there was no particle of space left between their bodies, and still Nick's hand was on her neck, and her arm was around his waist, trying to pull the other closer still. His bare skin felt hot under her touch, and she had to physically bring herself to move away from him long enough to pull her shirt over her head.

Nick used the opportunity to gently push her onto her back and move on top of her. For a moment, he took her face in both of his hands and kissed her lips, the next moment Charlize could feel his kisses and his hands trailing down her body, over her neck, down her collarbone. He pushed one of the cups of her bra down and kissed her breast, and Charlize arched her back at the sensation. "Nick," she moaned, her voice thick with her want, her _need,_ for him to continue what he was doing. As if he could read her thoughts, Nick started trailing his kisses further down her body, down her stomach, to the waistband of her jeans. The tingling in her lower stomach was almost unbearable. She felt both of his hands on her, yet she felt like it wasn't enough, she needed more, more touching, more kissing, _more._ She moaned again when he opened her jeans with swift fingers and pulled them down. To say that she was ready for him was an understatement. "Nick," she whispered more urgently. "I know, babe," he answered, his voice raspy. With quick movements he pulled off his sweatpants, and then it was only them, naked, and sweating, and needing each other. He moved back on top of her almost gently, staring into her eyes for a moment without moving. Charlize nodded her head slightly, and when he pushed into her, she opened for him like a flower. This time it was Nick who moaned.

"I love you," he whispered as he moved in and out of her. "God, I love you."

* * *

Charlize woke up from shouting. For a moment, in a sleepy daze, she thought she had dreamed it, but the voices didn't cease when she opened her eyes. People were shouting upstairs. "Nick," she whispered urgently, shaking his arm. "Nick!" He woke up slowly, but when he heard the voices, his eyes opened wide. "What's going on?" "I don't know." Charlize threw the blanket off of her and jumped out of bed, putting on her pants and shirt in a few quick movements. When Nick was dressed too, Charlize opened the door and both of them sprinted outside, through the corridor toward the stairs.

"What do you want, Jack?"

Charlize stopped in her tracks when she heard Alicia use that name. Nick almost ran into her. She turned and pushed him back, away from the stairs, all the while signaling him to be quiet. "It's the people who were following us," she whispered when she felt they were out of earshot.

"Fuck," Nick exclaimed, raising his hands to his head and pushing them against his forehead. Before either of them could say something else, they heard voices behind them, from somewhere on the lower deck. Nick acted quick and pulled Charlize into an empty room, leaving it open just enough for them to see who was talking. Charlize's heart was hammering in her chest. _What is happening?_ The voices came closer. Charlize didn't recognize the woman who was talking, but when they passed, she recognized the other person. It was Haley. The other woman was pushing Haley in front of her. Haley's hands were tied at her back, and she was bleeding from a wound on her forehead. Charlize's eyes widened in fear. "What are we gonna do?" she whispered to Nick. He put his index finger in front of his mouth in a gesture to be quiet, and then stepped into the corridor once more, tiptoeing closer to the stairs again. Charlize followed him quietly.

"...when Connor gets here," a voice that Charlize didn't recognize said.

"What's going to happen to us when he does?" Travis asked.

"We'll take you, Alicia, and the doctor."

"I'm not a fucking doctor," Haley said.

"Doesn't matter. You're as close as it gets."

Then, there was movement. Nick turned back to Charlize and started whispering. "We have to get to the cockpit. Strand has guns stored there." Charlize nodded, numb. She was aware of what was happening, but somehow she felt like she was dreaming, like it wasn't real. She wanted to ask him to pinch her, to slap her, to wake her up. Instead she said: "How are we getting past them? We have to go upstairs."

Nick through for a moment. "I'll distract them. You -" "What? No!" "Yes. Listen to me. There is a box underneath one of the benches in the cockpit. Big, and grey. Inside, there are two semi-automatic rifles. Take one, get back, wait for my signal."

"No, Nick! This - I can't -"

"Yes, you can," Nick said and turned around, walking up the stairs without waiting for an answer. Charlize wanted to shout after him, tell him to come back, tell him to get the guns himself, but he was gone.

"Well well, what's going on here?" Charlize could hear Nick say in a casual tone that did not suggest a hostage situation. "Fuck," she cursed under her breath as she hurried quietly toward the stairs, afraid of missing her window of opportunity. She carefully took a few steps and saw Nick standing at the top of the stairs. There was a commotion, and someone was shouting, but Nick raised his hands defensively.

"Whoa, no need to get aggressive," he said and walked further into the room and out of Charlize's frame of sight. She carefully moved up a couple more steps. She could see one person with a sniper rifle, moving around the living room, toward Nick. All of a sudden, Charlize realized what Nick was doing. He was luring the guy to turn his back to the stairs. She could feel sweat building on her forehead, and she quickly wiped it on her arm. She moved up a few more steps. She was almost at the top now. Nick was moving further into the room, and Charlize could now see Madison, Chris and Ofelia on the couch, and Daniel Salazar sitting in front of it, everyone's hands bound behind their back. Ofelia spotted her first, her eyes growing wide, everyone else was focused on Nick.

"Okay, okay," Nick was saying now. "Sorry I'm late to the party." He stretched his arms out in front of him, offering himself up to be bound. The gunman moved closer to him, apprehensive, and when he was right in front of Nick his back was completely turned on Charlize. She moved quickly and quietly. She moved up the last of the steps and then turned right and disappeared into the corridor leading to the cockpit. She had seen heads moving into her direction, but she kept moving, hoping the man with the sniper rifle hadn't been one of them. By the time she reached the door at the end of the corridor, her hands were shaking. She opened the door carefully, checking if any of the other gunmen she had heard was inside. To her relief, it was empty. She quickly moved inside and closed the door behind her. Her hands were still shaking when she found and opened the box Nick had described. The gun seemed huge to her, almost matching the sniper rifle of the gunman in the living room. She could hear more voices and arguing coming from outside, and she picked up the gun in a hurry. She was sweating again. She had never used a gun like this, and she barely even understood the workings of a hand gun. She moved the gun around in her hands, trying to locate the safety. She almost dropped it twice. "Fuck, fuck, fuck," she cursed her shaking. Eventually, she found the safety, and with a deep breath, she turned it off. Before she could move again she was interrupted by the noise of a motorboat. She quickly got up and covered the distance to the window in three quick strides. With a sinking heart, Charlize watched a motorboat driving away from the yacht in the early light of dawn, carrying Alicia, Haley and Travis with it. "No, no, no," she muttered. What would happen to the others? There was still shouting outside in the living room. With a deep breath, Charlize raised the rifle and left the cockpit.

"Just gives us the boat and we'll get to land. You can have the yacht!" Madison pleaded.

"Well you see, the boat is leaving with the yacht," a voice answered. The unspoken words hung in the air, almost palpable. _You're going to die._

When Charlize peaked around the corner to the living room, she saw two people with guns. A woman with a high ponytail and a sniper rifle, and a man with a matching rifle standing slightly in front of her. To her relief, she also saw that the others had been unbound. She pulled her head back around, out of sight, and contemplated who was the easier target. The woman was out on the terrace, the man just behind the door in the living room.

"So, who goes first?" the man asked.

Charlize took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a second. It was now or never. She peaked around the corner again, this time with the rifle. She leaned the barrel of the run against the corner and took aim at the man, standing in the door of the living room to the terrace, now waiving his gun around in his hand dangerously with a sly smile on his face. When she thought she had the aim, she held her breath, and without thinking she pulled the trigger. The shot was not as loud as she would have expected, but the kickback forced her to take a step back. When she moved back, the man was on the ground, dead, and everyone was crouched down. The woman with the other sniper rifle moved quickly to the door, her gun raised, but Charlize was quicker. She had the advantage of seeing her target while the woman was still confused as to who had shot her partner, and when she stepped through the door, Charlize released the trigger for a second time. The woman fell, dead.

For a moment, nobody moved. Charlize lowered the gun with shaking hands, and took a step into the room. "Charlie, no!" Ofelia, who was closest to her, shouted. Before she could react there were more shots, and then everything happened quickly. Charlize turned and saw a third gunman, raising his gun and firing in her direction, three, four times, before Chris tackled him and he dropped the gun. Madison was on him then, and buried a metal pipe in the man's stomach. Charlize had dropped her gun in shock, and Ofelia moved in and picked it up, moving toward the man on the ground to ensure that he was dead. The others shouted about Travis and Alicia, and Victor Strand, who was somehow missing, while Charlize stood frozen in shock, observing the scene in fast forward and in slow motion simultaneously. Madison went to hug Nick, then turned to Daniel, said something about getting Victor, and both of them disappeared onto the terrace.

Then, Nick was there, in front of her, his hands on her face. "Are you okay?" he said, but his voice sounded wrong, like he was in a tunnel, far away from her. "Charlie?" She didn't answer him. Instead she looked down at her black shirt. Nick took a step back, his hands wandering to her upper arms, his grip tight. Charlize moved her left hand to her stomach, and she started feeling dizzy. When she moved her hand up, it came back red.


	10. Take It Out

**THANK YOU abitoflightreading, Jacqb14, AnimeZombieLover & Justme2000 for the reviews that have come in since the last update! I'm so happy you enjoy the story as much as I like writing it. **

**Also thank you to anr017. It's funny that you are mentioning my leaving out Catrina Island. I've had a whole internal argument whether or not I should include it, but eventually opted for leaving it out because I felt there was no way I include it in an interesting way that wasn't just retelling what happened in the show, which I felt would be boring. I'm trying to swerve from the original story enough to keep the story interesting and make Charlize & Haley characters which are logical additions without distorting the big picture of FTWD. So it's all just a struggle of 'how do I tell their story without just plainly retelling seasons 1-3?'**

 **Anyway, how good was the season 3 mid-season finale? I'm definitely enjoying where the writers are taking the show. And what is everyone thinking of Nick's new haircut? I don't know what to make of it yet, I was getting really into the slick, pushed-back mafia-boss hairstyle. Don't judge me.**

 **Enough talking now, enjoy the new chapter!**

* * *

He slowly walked down the hallway, his eyes not focusing on the way, his feet taking him further automatically, as if he was on auto-pilot. He held out his hands in front of his torso awkwardly, not knowing what else to do with them. When he reached the door leading to the bathroom, he opened it carefully and absentmindedly walked in, leaving a red mark on the handle. When he was inside, he closed the door behind him and leaned against it. He felt like he was in a bad dream. The events of the last two hours played in his mind vividly, yet he could not grasp their reality, somehow it wasn't sinking in, like he was in a video game, or dreaming lucidly. They kept replaying, and replaying, and he was not able to stop it. _The abductors taking Alicia, shots, screaming, the hot blade, and blood; so much blood._ He bend over and started rubbing his temples with the inner part of his wrists, and made a noise that was more than a groan but less than a scream, a noise that a wounded animal might make.

Eventually, he took two tentative steps ahead, standing in front of the mirror. For a moment, Nick simply stood there, staring at his reflection. His hands were completely covered in blood, and splatters of it went up his forearms. There was blood on his shirt, his pants, neck, smears on his face where he wiped away sweat with his bloody hands. He could even see traces of red in his sweaty hair. When he moved at last, he turned on the tap with steady hands and started washing the blood off, moving almost mechanically.

He had managed to wash the majority of the blood off his hands when he heard someone hurriedly running down the stairs, his eyes becoming alert for the first time since he walked downstairs himself. "Nick!" his mother shouted and he raised his head. He covered the distance to the door in two quick strides and opened it in hard, taking a hurried step into the hallway. "Mom!" Madison was hurrying down the hallway to where he was standing, her eyes wide. "Mom," Nick repeated as he started walking into her direction. When she reached him, Madison pulled him in tight, her arms around his shoulders, one of her hands resting against the back of his head. He reciprocated the gesture, burying his head between her head and her shoulder. Eyes closed, Nick allowed himself for the first time to let the reality of the situation sink in. For a moment, his breath hitched. In his mother's arms, he finally managed to let go of the pressure. "Oh baby," Madison said. "I shouldn't have left." Nick pulled away and nodded silently. Madison kept her hands on him, her fingers inspecting the blood on his arms, his face.

"I took it out," Nick said, and Madison looked up to make eye contact. "The bullet. I took it out."

* * *

 _Charlize was still standing at the corner, frozen in shock. "Charlie," Nick shouted as he ran over to her. When he reached her, he took her face in both of his hands, and she finally looked up at him, like she was noticing him for the first time. "Are you okay?" he asked. She looked at him with a puzzled expression, her eyes still wide in shock, as if she wasn't hearing him. Then, she moved her hand down. Nick took a step back, lowering his hands to her arms instead, afraid she wasn't steady enough to stand on her own. She slowly moved her hand to her stomach, her eyes not following the movement but staring blindly down at the floor. Only when she moved her hand up again did she look, and when Nick saw the blood, his heart dropped. "No, no, no," he tightened his grip on her shoulders. Charlize opened her mouth and sucked in a sharp breath, looking up to meet his gaze, her eyes wider than before. "Oh," was all she managed to say._

 _Without thinking Nick moved his left arm under her shoulder and his right arm behind her legs, picking her up in one swift movement. She groaned in pain when he did. "Sorry," he whispered as he carried her to the couch, putting her down carefully. "Mom!" he shouted when he moved upright again, but it was too late. He could already see Madison and Salazar disappearing into the distance on the motorboat, looking for Strand._

 _"What happened?" Ofelia and Chris came up next to Nick, alerted by his tone of voice._

 _"She's shot," Nick said and bent down next to Charlize. Her eyes were closed and she was breathing heavily. "Hey..hey, Charlie," he started, not knowing what to do, his mind working in overdrive. "I need you to be conscious okay? I need you to tell me what to do," he pleaded with her. He could see her swallow hard, and eventually, she opened her eyes. The initial shock seemed to be gone, her eyes were more alert, even though her pupils were still dilated._

 _"Put pressure on the wound," was the first thing she said in a steady voice, almost commanding. Nick nodded and looked around, but before he could do anything Ofelia already handed him her cardigan. He swallowed and leaned forward, carefully pulling up her shirt. The blood was coming from the lower abdomen. "How many?" Charlize asked._

 _"What?"_

 _"How many entry wounds?"_

 _"I can't tell - I don't..-" Nick carefully used Ofelia's cardigan to clean the blood from Charlize's stomach. "Only one," he determined._

 _"Good," Charlize said. When Nick looked at her he could see that her eyes were closed again. "Check for an exit wound."_

 _Nick obliged and carefully pushed Charlize on her side. Her back was clean. "No exit wound."_

 _For a moment, Charlize was silent. Then, she took a deep breath. "You have to take it out."_

 _"What?" Nick said in surprise, a wave of anxiety hitting him._

 _"Yes," Charlize confirmed more to herself than to him. She was struggling to sit up and Ofelia was quick to support her. Charlize's hands carefully held up her shirt, and she inspected the wound. "I don't think it hit a major artery, there isn't enough blood. There is a chance that the bullet did hit an artery and is the only thing holding it shut, but the risk of infection is higher." Charlize groaned as she was lying back down. "Take it out."_

 _"How?" Nick asked in disbelief._

 _"What if it hit any organs?" Ofelia added anxiously._

 _"Put pressure on the wound!" Charlize instructed and Nick hurriedly pressed Ofelia's cardigan back on her stomach. "There is nothing you can do if it hit an organ," Charlize said, her eyes closed again. Nick could tell that she was more nervous than she was trying to let on. "From the position of the wound I think there is a chance it only hit the abdominal muscle, if we're lucky."_

 _"What if we're not lucky?" Chris asked the question on everyone's mind._

 _"There is a chance it hit my large intestine," Charlize said. "Can't fix that without surgery."_

 _For a moment they were silent, letting the information sink in. Then, Ofelia spoke. "What do you need us to do?"_

 _Charlize thought for a moment. "Get all the medical supplies we have, high-percentage alcohol - clear, and anything you can find to get the bullet out, small pliers, tweezers, something.."_

 _Chris swallowed. "They made Haley take the medical supplies.."_

 _"Check anyway!" Nick said, harsher than he meant to. The prospect of having to treat Charlize's gunshot wound without any experience made him sweat. He wiped his forehead on his sleeve. Ofelia and Chris ran to get everything they needed. Nick kneeled down next to the couch and took Charlize's hand in his free one. "You'll be fine," he said, trying to convince himself. Charlize opened her eyes and looked at him. "That depends on you," she smiled, but Nick could tell she was in pain._

 _"Don't!" Nick said, not smiling._

 _"I'll talk you through it," she replied, more serious. Nick nodded and leaned his head forward, pressing his forehead against hers._

 _Ofelia was the first one to return and Nick moved back to focus on Charlize's wound. She was carrying a bottle of vodka and a pair of flat-edged tweezers. "These were the only one's I could find," she said apologetically. Charlize picked them up carefully. "They should work." Ofelia nodded, her expression stern. Before Charlize could say anything else, Chris came running back into the room. "Haley left one of the bags!" he shouted victoriously._

 _"God bless that woman," Charlize smiled weakly. "Check what's inside."_

 _Chris complied, put the back down on the coffee table next to the couch and opened it. "Is there a compress?" Charlize asked._

 _Chris rummaged. "Yes!"_

 _"Good. Do you see an IV with saline solution?"_

 _A moments pause, then: "Yes!"_

 _Charlize let out a relieved breath. "Good. Now look for fluid antibiotics. It's a blue package and should say Linezolid with a roman five. 2mg."_

 _"Is that important now? Shouldn't we get the bullet out first?" Nick asked anxiously._

 _"There is a good chance that I'll pass out when you're getting the bullet out, and I need you to know what to do if I can't talk your through it anymore. There antibiotics are just as important as getting the bullet out. There is still a very realistic chance that the large intestine was hit," she groaned but continued talking. "If there is even minor damage to the intestine it's gonna leak fluid, and that is going to cause severe infection. Even if the bullet only hit the muscle I will need those antibiotics."_

 _All three of them nodded, trying to comprehend all the possible scenarios. Nick tried not to think of what would happen if the bullet hit an organ._ It only hit the muscle, _he kept telling himself._ Only the muscle.

 _"Have any of you ever prepared an IV?" Charlize asked. Nick looked up at Ofelia and Chris, but both of them were shaking their heads. "Okay," Charlize said. "Chris, give me the IV, the IV needles and tubing, and the antibiotics. If there is disinfectant in that bag give it to Ofelia. If not, Ofelia I need you to clean the tweezers with the Vodka. Chris, look for a medical threat and needle in the bag."_

 _Chris complied and handed her what she asked for. With a hiss of pain and help from Nick, Charlize sat up again and started assembling the IV. Chris rummaged in the bag, but his expression grew sterner by the second. "There's nothing," he said eventually. "No disinfectant, no needle, no threat," he looked up helplessly. "Check for a sewing kit," Charlize said and Chris quickly got up and left._

 _Nick continued to press the cloth on the wound. "I'm going to talk you through what you're going to have to do now," Charlize said eventually. Nick looked up at her. Charlize's gaze was concentrated and her eyes did not leave the IV she was working on. He nodded. "Okay."_

 _"Disinfect the would with the Vodka. Clean it as good as you can so you can see the entry, and then use the tweezers to carefully get the bullet out. Be careful that you don't push it in further. When you've got it, make sure it's complete and didn't fracture," she swallowed. "Disinfect the wound again when you're done, to be sure. Then you have to stitch it up. Disinfect. Put the compress on. Then you need to administer the IV. You know how to do that, you've used heroin for years. Make sure the IV hangs up high enough. I'm setting the dripping speed, so all you have to do after you've put the needle in is insert the tubing and remove the needle, and then open the valve. Like this-" she held out the IV and showed him what she meant. He nodded, trying to remember everything she had said. When she finished assembling the IV she started looking around the room. Nick noticed that a thin layer of sweat had build on her forehead. "Bring me that," she pointed at a standing hat and coat rack in the corner of the room, her hand automatically moving to take over the pressure on the wound. When he had brought it to her she gave him the IV to hang from it, carefully uncoiling the tubing. "Okay, should be fine," she said eventually and put down the tubing. She carefully laid back down. "Make sure there are no bubbles when you connect it. And disinfect it with the Vodka."_

 _"How am I supposed to remember all that?" Nick asked, feeling unable to cope with all the medical information. Before she could answer, Chris came back into the room. "I couldn't find any needles." Charlize didn't reply right away. When she did, she only said: "I'll think of something." Then: "Give me the Vodka." When Ofelia handed her the bottle, she took a big sip and handed it to Nick. She nodded, signaling him to start, then she put her head down on the couch and closed her eyes. "Disinfect the wound with the Vodka. Chris, I need you to hold my legs down. Ofelia, you hold my shoulders. Just in case."_

 _Ofelia and Chris move into position, placing their hands on Charlize's body softly at first, not wanting to hurt her. Nick swallowed. He willed his hands into being steady, and was relieved to find they were not shaking. He carefully lifted Ofelia's cardigan, now full of blood, and dripped a bit of Vodka onto Charlize's stomach. She hissed in pain. "Sorry," he apologized. Then he used the cardigan to wipe over the wound, trying to remove as much blood as he could so that he could see the wound. He dripped a little more Vodka on it when he was done, and then took the tweezers in his right hand. His heart was hammering in his chest. He adjusted his position so he was closer to the wound which was already covered in fresh blood. He swallowed one more time and then lowered the tweezers. He tried to be as careful as he could when he entered the wound. He could feel the tweezers touching the skin inside the wound, it was tighter than he had imagined. He could feel Charlize tense when he did, but she did not make a sound. He could not see a way in which he did not do more damage to the wound than there already was, but he had to get in there to get the bullet out. He closed his eyes for a second and took a deep breath, then he pushed the tweezers in as careful as he could. This time, Charlize hissed in pain and both Chris and Ofelia tightened their grip to stop her from moving. Nick pushed the tweezers in further, trying to follow the trail of the bullet. He had to use more pressure than he liked, and it was causing the wound to bleed more than it did before. There was no way he was able to see what he was doing, so he had to go by what he was feeling. The tweezers were hitting a point where he could not push further, so he adjusted the angle. Charlize groaned. He could not seem to find the trail of the bullet, it was like trying to push an earring through a hole that was already partially closed up. Nick could feel the sweat on his forehead intensifying. "I can't find it," he said. "Keep. Trying." Charlize said through gritted teeth. For a moment, Nick made eye contact with Ofelia. She looked as helpless as he felt. He did not want to keep hurting Charlize, but he kept pushing the tweezers anyway. The more he pushed, the more she groaned, and Chris and Ofelia were having more and more trouble holding her steady. "You have to stop moving," Nick said apologetically, trying hard to keep the tweezers steady. He kept hitting walls, having to adjust the angle. He was starting to get anxious, and just when he thought he had tried every angle, he found a position which let him push the tweezers in even further. This time, Charlize screamed. "I'm sorry," Nick kept repeating as he worked. "I'm sorry." Even his hands were getting sweaty, and he was having trouble keeping the tweezers tight. "Come on, come on, come on," he said more to himself than to anyone else, probing in the wound as carefully as he could._

 _And just when he thought the tweezers would be too short to reach it, he could feel them hit something hard. "I've got it!" he exclaimed. Nick carefully moved the tweezers so that he could reach it, but just when he had it Charlize moved in pain and he lost it. "Hold her tighter!" he instructed Chris and Ofelia. He moved the tweezers back and Charlize screamed again. This time, when the tweezers found the bullet again, he did not lose it. He carefully started moving his hand up, removing he tweezers from the wound, and when they did, the bullet came out as well. "Yes!" he exclaimed, looking up at Ofelia who had a relieved smile on her face. But when he looked at Charlize, his smile dropped. Her eyes were closed and her face was tight in pain. Her face was glistening in sweat, and her breathing was hard and fast. Nick quickly poured some Vodka over the wound and then the bullet, cleaning it, making sure it was intact. Thankfully, it was. "Nick, it's bleeding pretty bad," Chris said anxiously. Nick looked back at the wound and saw more blood oozing out than before._ 'There is a chance that the bullet did hit an artery and is the only thing holding it shut,' _Charlize's words from before replayed in his mind. "Charlie, there is a lot of blood," he said anxiously, pushing the cardigan back on to put pressure on it. "What do we do?"_

 _Charlize swallowed hard. "You have to cauterize it."_

 _For a second, Nick felt dizzy. "No," he uttered._

 _"Cauterize?" Chris asked._

 _"Burn it," Charlize said._

 _"No," Nick said again, shaking his head._

 _"Yes," Charlize said through gritted teeth. "Take a knife, the biggest you can find. Heat it on the stove. Burn it."_

 _For a moment, nobody moved. Both Ofelia and Chris looked at Nick helplessly. "Now!" Charlize almost yelled. Ofelia was the first one to move, running to the kitchen._

 _"I can't do this," Nick said, shaking his head, as if his words could change the necessity of the wound having to be closed._

 _"Yes, you can," Charlize said. "It's gonna be fine. We already have antibiotics in the IV." Nick looked at her helplessly. Her eyes were still closed, and her chest was moving up and down quickly, her breathing not slowing down. This time, when Ofelia handed him the glowing knife, his hands were shaking._

 _"I can do it," Chris said._

 _"No," Nick replied. He swallowed hard, and lowered the knife._

* * *

"She passed out when we burned the wound," Nick told Madison. They were standing next to the couch. Madison was kneeling next to Charlize, carefully stroking her head. Her breathing had slowed down, but there was still sweat glistening on her face. Behind the couch, the IV on the coat rack was slowly dripping antibiotics into her system.

"Is she going to be okay?" Daniel Salazar asked from behind them. Nick had not heard him enter. He shrugged and shook his head lightly, not knowing what else to do. "I don't know."

"You did good," Salazar said, even though his voice was still stern.

"How is Victor?" Madison asked.

"Hypothermic, but he should be fine after some rest and warming up," Salazar said.

"What happened?" Nick asked his mother.

"He took one of the boats and tried to run when he heard them coming. They noticed, and shot his boat down. He must've been in the water for at least 5 hours," Madison told him.

"Did they find us because of Alicia?" Nick asked.

Madison looked at him uncomfortably. Then she nodded. "Only Ofelia and Chris were outside when they came. Two men and a pregnant woman. They pretended that she was having the baby, and Chris didn't know how to react. When we came up Haley took her downstairs, saying she was a nurse and could help. And when they were gone the two guys pulled their guns." Madison shook her head, angry.

"How do we get them back?" Nick asked.

"We have the leader's brother here," Madison replied. "The one who shot Charlie."

"He's dead," Nick replied, irritated. They had locked his dead body into one of the bedrooms.

Madison shrugged. "They don't know that when he's turned and has a bag over his head."

Nick nodded. "I'll go."

"Nick," Madison started, but he interrupted her.

"They took my sister!" he shouted angrily. "And I don't know if she's going to be okay." He looked at Madison intensely and pointed at Charlize, his voice quieter now, but still threatening. "They shot my girlfriend, and I don't know if _she_ is going to be okay!"

Madison nodded. "We'll go together."


	11. Wrath

**First of all: I am so sorry that I couldn't keep my promise and it took me two months to update! I'm so grateful for all of you who are (maybe/hopefully) still patiently waiting!**

 **The second half of the season motivated me to keep working. How good was Monday's episode? I'm really loving season 3 so far.**

 **Anyway, while the last chapter was more for emotional stress, this chapter will push the plot forward again. Hope you enjoy!**

 **And as usual, thank you again to Lone-Wolf-Ranger, thetracyset, anr017, Jacqb14 & sillychick13 for your reviews! Your feedback means a lot to me. :)**

* * *

The body on the ground was shuffling, moving from left to right, pushing against the restraints that bound its hands and feet. The metal pipe buried in its stomach made clanging sounds whenever it touched the ground, and for a while, the clanging and the grunts were the only sounds in the room.

"How are we going to pull off a hostage exchange when our hostage is dead and actively pierced by a metal pipe?" Nick spoke eventually, voicing the question on everyone's mind. Daniel Salazar took a step closer to the body on the ground, kneeling down to inspect it up close. "It can work," he said after a moment, in his usual confident tone.

"How?" Nick asked.

"Clean up this mess," Salazar continued, gesturing toward the pipe sticking out of the stomach, "and then put a bag over his head."

Nick looked over to Madison, who was intently watching the body on the floor, her eyebrows furrowed in thought. "Could work," she nodded. "How do we find them?"

"You weren't listening to him yesterday, were you?" The corners of Daniel's mouth twitched upward into a sly smile. He stood up from his crouched position on the floor and walked out of the room, Madison and Nick following. "When they were waiting for the rest of them, he was trying to scare us," Salazar continued as he walked up the narrow stairs of the _Abigail_. "Warning us of his big, bad brother. Telling us how we shouldn't waste out energy struggling against them, how they had already taken 5 boats, how well manned they were." Salazar was walking through the upstairs living area, taking them into the cockpit. Strand was lying on one of the benches, covered under two blankets, a cup of steaming tea in front of him, but Salazar went straight to the radar. "We are looking for a cluster of about 5 or 6 boats." He had only inspected the radar for ten seconds when he pointed his finger. "Here," he said. "These five, near the coast. Could be fisher boats, they tend to travel together."

Nick came up behind him, staring at the little screen. Indeed he could see five little shapes close to the coastline. It was not too far from them, most likely a couple of hours away.

For a while, they stood around the cockpit, discussing possible scenarios on how the hostage exchange could work. Salazar estimated that the others had probably around 30 men, which would complicate matters, but the hostage exchange was still the best idea they had to get their people back. When they started to head back to prepare the dead brother, Strand motioned for Nick to stay behind. Nick furrowed his brow and walked over to where he was lying.

"I need you to do something for me," Strand told him in his typical deep voice.

"And what's that?" Nick said, sitting down on the coffee table opposite the bench.

"I need you to take the remaining motorboat, go to shore, and pick someone up."

Nick guffawed. "Sure," he said sarcastically.

"I'm serious. His name is Luis. I was supposed to meet him alone and he was going to take me back across the border with him," Strand told matter-of-factly.

"What?" Nick's expression changed immediately, realizing Strand was completely serious. "And when were you going to tell us that?"

"I wasn't," Strand simply said.

"So instead of rescuing my sister and the others, I'm supposed leave this boat and pick up a guy you were going to ditch us for?" Nick said incredulously, getting up. "That's not going to happen."

He had just reached the door when Strand spoke again. "He has guns."

Nick stopped and looked back at Strand.

"You're going to need more guns if you want to get them back, you know that," he explained calmly. "You will not be able to go before tomorrow morning anyway. You will only need half a day to pick up Luis, so you will be back tonight. He has guns, and he has excellent aim, and afterwards I will get us all to a safe place in Mexico."

* * *

The waves were gently rocking the boat as Nick was undressing, making him sway while taking off his pants. When he was completely naked, he took his clothes and put them in the backpack he had brought, which he hoped would be at least partially waterproof. He had stopped the boat a little ways off the coast, so it would not be drawn in by the tide. He hadn't told his mother or any of the others where he was going, instead he had simply left, like he was so used to doing. He had stopped by Charlie, and had told her unconscious body that he would be back soon. There hadn't been a change in her condition, and there was nothing he could to for her anymore. He needed Haley. And to get Haley, and Travis, and his sister, he would need more guns. Strand had been convincing with his arguments, and Nick gladly jumped at the change to be active and do something, instead of sitting on the boat all day planning, and thinking, and worrying.

When he had sealed the backpack and bound it to his ankle, he jumped into the ocean without much hesitation. The cold water engulfed him, and for a moment, he felt a rush of adrenaline, like when he had explored the overturned boat a couple of days prior. He easily covered the distance to shore, cherishing the way his body moved through the water effortlessly, how the waves carried him to the beach. When he set foot on solid ground, his body felt heavier than before. He quickly unpacked his clothes and was relieved to find them dry, even though they soaked up the water from his body when he put them on again.

Nick started walking up the beach, trying to orientate himself and find one of the points Strand had described when he was explaining where he had to go. There was a camp behind the dunes, dozens of tents covering the grassy ground, but there were no people there. At least, no people that were alive. Nick saw a few infected in his close vicinity and even more in the distance. A man in a flannel shirt and dark hair and a missing jaw, a woman in a floral dress and dead eyes; he wondered how he would make it past them. It would take up a lot of energy to take them all out, if he even could.  
For a long time he stood on top of the dune, watching the infected man with the flannel shirt, wondering...and then he decided. It was worth a try.

Nick pulled out a knife from his backpack and casually jogged down the dune toward one of the open tents. When he had ensured that it was empty, he turned around and whistled, loud enough for the infected man to hear him, but not loud enough to draw the rest of them. When he had gotten the attention of the man, Nick stepped into the tent, which was big enough for him to stand upright comfortably, and closed the zipper of the mosquito net. The infected man did exactly what Nick had intended for him to do: he pushed against the tent, trying to get inside, his eyes staring into nothing, his jaw snapping eagerly. Nick took a tentative step toward the moving figure and then, in one smooth motion, buried the knife deep in its skull. It stopped moving instantly. Nick quickly opened the zipper again and the body fell into the tent with a thud. He knelt down next to it, turning it over so it was lying on its back, and then opened up the flannel shirt to expose the dead skin underneath. For a moment, Nick hesitated. Was he out of his mind? Was this a new level of crazy, even for him?

But in the end, he was too curious. He lifted his knife, buried it deep in the skin, and pulled. The smell almost made him gag, but he persevered. When the cut was wide enough, Nick carefully stuck his hand inside, trying not to think about the fact that his arm was inside a dead man, trying to ignore the consistency of the intestines. He started pulling, and with one last deep breath, his started covering himself in the dead man's blood.

* * *

Nick squeezed through the fence that had once encircled the safe zone when there were still people and looked at the smudged handwriting on the damp note he was holding.

 _BYO VIAJE BLVD._

He was in the right place, he only had to find #9208. He started walking down the street, easily passing the few infected that were present. His idea had worked. Once he was covered in their smell, they were no longer interested in him. He checked the numbers on every house he passed, each prettier and more expensive than the last one. Palm trees decorated the side of the road, the bushes in the front yards were all still well trimmed, and the houses were white and spotless, with elegant red roof shingles.

When he found #9208, he double checked his note to see if he had read it correctly. The house was nice, but it was also unfinished. The structure was done, but there was paper and plastic covering the windows and doors. He tried to look through one of the plastic covered windows but couldn't make out anything, so he casually strode up the the front door and knocked. For a moment there was no answer, but before he could knock again he heard the sound of a gun cocking behind him. He turned around and immediately raised his arms in the air. "Hey, hey," he said. "Don't shoot."

The man in front of him was pointing a gun at him. He was shorter than Nick, and he assumed him to be in his early 40s, with dark brown hair, a black sweater, and a ruthless expression on his face. The man, who Nick assumed to be Luis, didn't answer him, so he kept on talking. "Strand send me, Strand! Look," he said and unfolded Strand's note, showing it to the man who's expression seemed to be getting even darker. "Abigail," Nick continued, pointing at the paper. That word seemed to do the trick, because the man slowly lowered his gun and put it away. Nick's posture relaxed. "About time," Luis simply said.

And as soon as that, Luis was moving about, loading luggage into an expensive-looking silver car. He had put on a black coat, and combined with his black shirt with a blue collar sticking out from a shirt underneath, his well-groomed hair and neat jeans, he looked more like a jet-setter than a survivor of the apocalypse.

"So you're gonna get all of us across the border?" Nick asked.

"If you tidy up," Luis simply said, looking him up and down in an exaggerated gesture. "You're definitely not rubbing that stench on my leather interior."

Nick had to smile. Of course Strand was friends with someone like Luis, he could see their similarities.

When Nick had cleaned up using the last of the water pressure, and Luis had given him clothes of his to put on, they took Luis' Porsche back to the coast. Nick was trying to discuss how they would cross the border, but it was hard over the Spanish rap that was blasting through the car stereo.

"I have secured cash and organised passage for _two_ people," Luis said when they arrived at the coast and he got out of the car. "Two people, not _eleven._ It's not like adding guests to a dinner reservation."

"Well, Strand must have planned for us," Nick argued.

"Victor is impulsive," Luis simply said. Without another word, he jumped down a small incline and pulled back a black tarpaulin, uncovering another motorboat.

The trip back to the _Abigail_ was uneventful. The sun was setting when they reached it, and even from afar Nick could see Madison waiting for them outside, the angry look on her face unmistakable.

"You didn't think to tell us?" she said harshly once they docked and Nick got off the motorboat onto the yacht.

"You would've had objections," Nick simply shrugged.

"Damn right I would have," Madison said and eyed Luis suspiciously.

"He's going to help us," Nick said, even though he wasn't so sure. In the corner of his eye he could see Strand coming on deck, and Luis went up to him and they both disappeared out of view.

"We could have reached the others tonight, but thanks to this we have to wait until tomorrow. You better hope they don't send backup when their people don't show!"

"Luis has guns, and he can help us get across the border," Nick told her, again not being entirely sure of the truthfulness of his words. "Now you and I can take extra defenses when we go make the exchange."

"You and I are not going to do anything," Madison said, shaking her head. "I'm going with Victor."

"What?" Nick almost shouted, taken off guard. "You said we would go together!"

"And then you disappeared and jeopardized our whole plan. There's no discussion." And there wasn't, because as soon as she had spoken, Madison turned around and left.

* * *

Haley's head was pounding. The small cabin they had given her had a stale smell to it and no outside window, so instead of giving her energy, a full night's sleep had left her with a raging headache. They had not even allowed her to share a cabin with Alicia. She had no intention of staying here.

They were on a huge ship in a marina. After dark, Haley had managed to sneak out unseen and check out her surroundings. The ship was lifted out of the water, there had probably been maintenance when the world ended, and it was right on the shoreline; if you jumped off one end, you'd land on water, if you jumped off the other end, you'd be on land. Alicia and Haley were free to roam the ship, Haley having medical training and Alicia having volunteered to join them back on the _Abigail_ in order to keep her family save, but Travis was kept in locked cages on one of the lower decks. When Haley had found him yesterday night, she had been immediately reminded of the cages Nick and the other patients had been kept in when they were at the military hospital back in Los Angeles.

Haley slowly slipped back into her jeans and shirt and looked at herself in the small, dirty mirror on the back of the door, before putting her long, black hair into a high ponytail. Without doing anything else, she opened the door and started waking toward the kitchen, desperate to get out of her stuffy cabin.

She had hoped to find Alicia, but instead Connor was sitting at the table in the kitchen, a smug look on his face. He was physically appalling. "Good morning, sunshine," he said when he saw her. Haley simply ignored him and went to the community fridge, grabbing some eggs to make herself breakfast.

"I see you feel right at home," Connor said confidently.

"I didn't have much choice," Haley said dryly.

"You should be happy," Connor said, his confident tone aggravating Haley even more. "We don't just take anyone. We're selective."

"Am I supposed to be grateful?" Haley turned away from the stove, staring at Connor almost challengingly.

For a second, he simply stared at her. "You should be. You go your rounds, help the community, and we'll give you a nice life. I can really use someone like you."

"Well, that's just _neat,"_ Haley said sarcastically. Connor ignored her. He got up, put his plate in the sink and walked to the door. Before he left, he turned around. "One of my men is sick, got a wound that got infected. I'll expect you to take care of that after your breakfast."

* * *

Haley spent the whole morning doing rounds, seeing everyone on the ship that had any pain, or discomfort, or even just a scratch. She didn't like the ship - it was too big and the air was too damp - and she didn't like the people. The men were cocky, like Connor was, trying to hit on her as soon as they saw her, each and every one thinking their pick-up line was original, and the women were arrogant and closed-off, looking at Haley like an outsider. Yeah, she had no intention of staying here.

She was walking down a small corridor on one of the lower decks when all of a sudden, a door next to her opened and she was pulled inside. Before she could do anything or even think of defending herself, Alicia took a step backwards, holding one hand in the air apologetically, and the other in front of her mouth, motioning for Haley to be quiet. _She's not supposed to be here,_ Haley thought immediately.

"Are you alright?" Haley asked in a hushed voice.

"Yeah, yeah..I'm fine," Alicia said quietly, shaking her head slightly. "They're having me monitor the radar."

For a second, Alicia was silent.

"What is it?" Haley asked.

"The other's were never dropped off."

"What?" Haley asked incredulously. They had made the deal to join Connor if the others from the _Abigail_ were dropped off at shore safely before the yacht was seized.

"Jack,...he told me they make everyone that promise, every time they take one." Alicia paused, swallowed, and looked Haley deep in the eyes. "He doesn't know if they're alive."

Haley's heart dropped. They should've fought. They should've fought when the others entered the _Abigail_ for the first time, hell, even when Connor and the others joined to pick them up. She should have known better. "Fuck them," Haley exclaimed eventually, not knowing how else to channel her anger.

"Jack and I are getting out of here. We're taking a boat, see if we can find the others, if they're alive. We'll take you and Travis with us," Alicia said, and there was a determination in her voice that Haley had not heard from her before.

"I know where Travis is," Haley nodded.

"Can you get him alone or do you need help?"

"I'll be fine," Haley said and Alicia nodded.

"Meet us in two hours on the top deck. Connor will be distracted so we can slip out," she added and carefully opened the door again, but before she could walk out, Haley grabbed her hand. "Be careful," she told her.

"You too," Alicia said, gave her hand a squeeze, and left.

* * *

The bottom deck with the cages was even damper than the other areas of the ship, and Haley started breathing through her mouth when she walked along the small walkway. Travis was the only person in the holding cells, which made her task easier.

"We're leaving," Haley told him before he could say anything.

"How are you go-" Travis started, but Haley lifted her right hand so he could see the bolt cutter she was holding.

Travis nodded appreciatively. "That works."

Haley came closer and looked at the chain, wondering where best to cut.

"What about Connor?" Travis asked.

Haley chuckled sarcastically. "He said he could really use someone like me," she said and placed the bolt cutter. Then she looked up at Travis again. "No one uses me," she said and cut the chain. Haley quickly pulled it away and opened the door. "Alicia and Jack will meet us on the top deck." Travis raised an eyebrow in surprise at the mention of Jack's name. "Yeah, he's leaving with us. Connor will be distracted so we have a small window to leave."

Travis nodded and both of them started heading back to the door, but as soon as they were back in the stairwell, they heard voices - people coming down.

"Shit," Haley muttered. Since they were on the lowest floor, there was no other escape route than up.

"Here," Travis whispered and quickly pulled her toward a small, dark corner underneath the stairs. If they'd push against the wall enough, they might be looked over. Both of them huddled in and pressed their backs against the cold metal. Haley exchanged one more worried look with Travis before the people reached their floor.

"-get him and get it over with," one of them said as they were walking down the last flight of stairs. There were three of them, all big and armed. If they saw them, Haley and Travis wouldn't stand much of a chance to fight their way out.

The first one opened the door and stopped in his tracks, causing the man behind him to bump into his back. "Fuck!" he exclaimed, and quickly moved into the the room.

"How did he get out?" Haley heard one of them saying from inside.

"Someone cut the chain," the first man said angrily, and there was a rattling sound. He must have picked the chain up. Then, the footsteps were coming back toward the door.

"Find him!" the first man bellowed as he started walking back up the stairs, the other two following him like trained dogs. "Find all of them!"

Haley released a breath when they were out of earshot.

"We need to get out of here now," Travis said and was the first to move. "Do you have anything to defend yourself?"

Haley nodded and pointed at the bolt cutter she was still holding and at a knife that was attached to her hip. She handed him the bolt cutter. Together, they carefully moved up the stairs, deck after deck, until they reached the top floor.

"We have to go to the end of that hallway," Haley whispered, carefully peaking around a corner. "That's where we find the ladder to the top deck."

Travis nodded and walked first, in a slightly crouched position, carefully placing one foot in front of the other. Haley made up the rear and kept glancing over her shoulder to see if someone was coming from behind. They had almost reached the end of the hallway when Haley saw movement in the corner of her eye. And sure enough, when she turned around, a tall man with a big, dark beard stood in the hallway, looking almost surprised that he had actually found them. "Hey!" he said, but for a second, he was frozen, seemingly contemplating what the next logical step would be. Haley acted on instinct. She grabbed the bolt cutter from Travis' hands and started to run toward the man. Apparently, he had expected her to run instead of charge, and so his eyes grew wide in surprise for a second. He started hectically fidgeting for his gun, but before he could loosen it from his holster, Haley was already upon him. She took a big swing with the bolt cutter while she was still moving, and when she was close enough, she hit it across his head as hard as he could.

The sound of bone cracking under the impact was something Haley would not forget. The man's head hit the wall next to him and then he sunk to the floor, all muscles in his body going limp. Blood was gushing from the wound on his right temple. For a second, Haley was frozen. Then, she slowly knelt next to him, placing a hand on his throat, feeling for a pulse. She did not find one.

"Haley," Travis hissed from the other end of the hallway, and she snapped out of her momentary shock. She turned around and ran back to him without another look back at the dead man on the floor. Travis looked at her for a moment, concerned, but she ushered him on. "Go," she said. "Go."

They moved up the ladder quickly and thankfully, Alicia and Jack were already on the top deck. When Alicia saw them she walked over, giving Travis a hug, and then looking at Haley, a flicker of surprise on her face. "What happened?" she asked, looking at Haley's face and down her body. Only then did Haley notice that some of the blood had splattered on her when she hit the bearded man. Haley only shook her head. "We have to leave now!" she said instead.

"Yeah, we have another problem," Alicia said and led them to the bow of the ship. "Look," she added, pointing at one of the piers. A group of people, including Connor, had assembled at the pier, standing there as if they were waiting for someone.

"I thought he was supposed to be gone," Haley said.

"He was," Alicia confirmed, exchanging a meaningful look with Haley.

Before they could say anything else, they heard a motorboat approaching. So they _were_ waiting for someone, Haley thought.

"Shit," Travis exclaimed before any of the others had seen it. "Madison."

And sure enough, Madison and Strand were approaching in a small motorboat, with a third, hooded figure. For a second, Haley didn't understand what was going on; and then the penny dropped. "Shit," she said, her eyes growing wide. "This was supposed to be a hostage exchange."

The other three looked at her. "And we had already run, so they don't have any hostages to exchange," Alicia concluded, the realization dawning on her as well.

They looked back to the scene at the pier. Strand pulled the motorboat close and remained seated, while Madison and the hooded figure got off and started walking toward Connors' group. They were talking, but Haley couldn't make out what they were saying from so far away. However, she could see the expressions, and they weren't good news. Then, Madison was yelling, still incomprehensible. They started getting angry.

"We need to do something," Alicia said.

All of a sudden, Madison cut the restraints that were binding the hooded man's arms and pushed him toward Connor. She slowly walked backwards, and when Connor lifted the hood, she started running.

The man underneath the hood was dead, and he was coming at Connor so hard that they fell over together. Then, chaos ensued, and all Haley and the others could do was watch. The others of Connors' group started shooting, not only at the infected man trying to bite Connor, but also at the motorboat. Madison had made it back into the boat, but Strand could not direct it back to where they had come from - there was too much open space and they would be too much of an easy target. Instead, he steered the boat to the left side of the ship Haley and the others were on, so that the ship formed a barrier between the pier and them.

"Come on!" Travis shouted and started running toward the left side of the ship as well. When he leaned over the railing, Strand and Madison were just pulling around. "Maddy!" Travis shouted, and thankfully, she heard them. Madison's eyes grew wide when she saw them, and Strand started waving them over.

"We need to jump," Travis said. Haley looked at the distance from the deck to the water, and her hands started shaking. It was _high._ Ajump would be painful.

"Alicia," Jack said all of a sudden. The two exchanged a look for a moment, and then he shook his head.

"I'm sorry, Jack," Alicia said and turned around. Without hesitation, she climbed over the railing and jumped.

"You now," Travis instructed, pointing at Haley. Haley swallowed hard and approached the railing. She carefully climbed over, took a deep breath, and without looking down, she jumped.

She felt like she was in the air forever. The rush of falling pumped her full of adrenaline, and when she hit the water, it was more painful than any diving board experience she'd ever made. Water filled her nose and she could taste the saltwater as she sunk down. She quickly started moving arms and legs, trying to reach the surface. When she broke through, she sucked in air almost hungrily, and breathing was painful. She moved in the water hectically, turning around and trying to find the motorboat, when a hand reached out to her.

As Strand pulled her in, there was another splash in the water where Travis landed.

When all three of them were in the motorboat, Strand carefully steered the boat back to the bow of the ship, so they could peak around and look what was happening at the pier.

"We need to warn the others," Madison said, but Strand shook his head. "We can't take the direct way, they're blocking us. We would have to go along the coast at least for a mile and then go back out."

"You don't have a radio?" Travis asked, but Strand shook his head.

"But they're all alive?"

Madison paused for a second, but nodded eventually. Haley sighed, relieved.

When they were close enough to the bow to look around, they started hearing voices. A lot of hectic voices, many of them talking and yelling over each other.

"Shit," Strand cursed. "Connor's still alive."

And then there was one voice that silenced all the others, a voice that chilled Haley to the bone.

"Find them! And take boats out to their yacht," Connor shouted, his voice loud and full of rage. "Kill them all!"


End file.
